ASSASSINS!!1 A Story of Courage and Valour

Bommando · 09-23-2005, 02:47 AM

Note: Some parts of this story may have been exaggerated to paint the protagonists in a brighter light.

What follows is a graphic novel telling tales of great heroism behind enemy lines. Two men, the weight of the world on their shoulders sought to dual-handedly infiltrate enemy territory on a mission fraught with grave danger. The heroes in question were known by their callsigns "Ultrablue" and "Bommando", hereafter referred to collectively as "UltraBom". Note the studly caps.

The tale starts with Ultrablue setting up his covert "Assassins" squad while he waited for his accomplice Bommando to get off the phone and join the Tactical Gamer Battlefield 2 server. He felt compelled to lock the squad for fear of exposing other unsuspecting team mates to extreme danger. This is a burden he could not bear, since the task that followed required unprecedented skill and covert action.

Bommando paradropped into the Daqing Oilfields to aid Ultrablue in his mission of disruption and destruction. Despite being outnumbered by a stoic defence, our heroes convinced their enemies that they were being assaulted by a superior force. The evil Jepzilla held strong though, but UltraBom's job was done. They kept 6 men busy in fear of their 1337 skills.

After receiving countless campaign accolades from their CO, UltraBom were airlifted to the Zatar Wetlands on a top secret mission of great importance: Render the enemy CO blind by sabotaging his valuable assets and prevent him from repairing them. The key was to remain unseen, refrain from entering enemy vehicles and engage only when they have been engaged themselves.

UltraBom entered a Fast Attack Vehicle and made their way to a boat at the next CP in order to use the cover of water-filled canyons to execute their mission. The mission proceeded as planned until Ultrablue called for a toilet break while driving the RIB. He used a brick to keep the throttle down while he relieved himself over the side of the boat. Unfortunately, his negligence caused their transport to run aground. Ultrablue was UltraCrap and fled the scene, leaving Bommando in the driver's seat trying to get the boat to back up off the land. Bommando confiscated Ultrablue's keys and threw them into the marshes in disgust.

After forgiving Ultrablue for jeopardising their their mission, Bommando suggested they walk 1km over the hills towards the enemy UCB. UltraBom hiked over the hilltops, using the opportunity to spot incoming enemy vehicles for their team, because that's just the kind of guys they are: team players through and through. After bickering about blisters and sore feet, the heroes finally reached their destination and were treated to a deceptively quiet vista of a friendly CP.

Not having much time to stop and admire the view, UltraBom proceeded to negotiate the small stream next to the enemy UCB and plant their explosives first on the UAV and Radar so they wouldn't be revealed. They attached their C4 at each asset and simultaneously detonated their munitions to complete their task.

Their mission was a roaring success, but they were surprised by the enemy engineers arriving from the aircraft carrier by boat to initiate repairs on the assets. Had the enemy not known who they were facing? Surely engaging UltraBom on equal terms would be certain suicide. Knowing that they must not engage the enemy unless they were themselves engaged or the enemy began repairing their assets, UltraBom lay in waiting for the right moment to strike.

After a series of engagements with UltraBom, the enemy knew that they were outclassed in 1 on 1 combat, so they mounted their armoured vehicles which UltraBom had so courteously left vacant. Cowards.

After a long game of cat and mouse, UltraBom were eventually flushed out and forced to fall back to the front lines where they were needed for yet another vital mission.

Enemy snipers were tearing up our front line troops and were in dire need of support while they valiantly attempted to capture enemy Control Points.

UltraBom knew that to engage a sniper face to face was suicide, so they employed diversion and surreptitious flanking manoeuvres to fulfil their task. One of them would spot enemy snipers and engage them from a distance while the other would silently flank them and slit their throat from behind. The technique proved very effective and the enemy snipers soon quivered in their leafy boots. Never knowing who would fall next, the snipers retreated and sought backup from vehicles. Even the evil mastermind Jepzilla fell victim to the UltraBom killing machine.

Bommando fell briefly when he took on 3 snipers at once in hand to hand combat. Inhumanely shot in the face when all he was brandishing was a knife. His team mates showed their gratitude however, taking care of his assailant and reviving him to get back into the fight.

Bommando · 09-23-2005, 02:47 AM

Too afraid to engage UltraBom in hand to hand combat again, Jepzilla returned with a Blackhawk in an attempt to thwart UltraBom's stranglehold on their forces. Unfortunately for Jepzilla, his squad was so afraid of their menacing power, they bailed from the helo and left Jepzilla alone without the ability to man armaments. Jepzilla futilely attempted to squash Ultrablue under the hull of the Blackhawk. Bommando soon rushed to his squadmate's aid by planting C4 around his pinned comrade.

Jepzilla bugged out in the face of his imminent demise and limped off with his tail between his legs to track down yet more support to fight off this indomitable 2 man force.

The enemy rolled in with 2 tanks and an APC to help the hapless Jepzilla, while he and his newly formed squad "SQUISH BOM" hovered aloft with their cowardly Miniguns. UltraBom were not deterred however. They stayed well hidden in the long grasses, becoming at one with nature, rendering themselves invisible to the hostile forces above and around them.

The tanks did their mightiest to bring down the terrible twosome, but all UltraBom left behind them were the burning husks of those who dared to oppose them.

So friends. Rest your eyes upon the exploits of the UltraBom 2 man army and quiver in your boots should you ever face them in battle. Pray they are either on your side or at least far away, for their knives will find you if you are close ...

All images from this story have been scaled to fit most monitors. To view the screenshots at the size they were taken (1680 x 1050), click here. The images without prefixes are the originals.

jepzilla · 09-23-2005, 08:55 AM

Haha. I was wondering why I only saw you and Ultrablue on Daqing. I was thinking, 'where's the other 4 guys?' in between asking the rest of my squad to hunt you all down. I've got to say though I think you two did a better job at killing my tank than the entire Chinese airforce! I spent the entire round dodging missiles, bombs and rockets. I got to see what air-to-ground missiles look like as they fly past. More than once.

On Zataar, I wasn't going to hang around while the armor at your flag was shooting at me! I blackhawked Ultrablue, extracted my squad and bugged out without getting shot down. But if I had seen you on the ground I would have landed the blackhawk on you too, Bom! You need to bait your C4 traps better. :P I was thoroughly impressed by your knifing of me at the beginning of the round. I didn't think anybody would find me there.

As for being an evil mastermind... well flattery will get you nowhere!

**TG_Bubba** · 09-23-2005, 09:05 AM

Nice, and they even play well with others.

I was in Jaymind squad when you came in. I ran to the fixed AA where the chopper spawns to kill a guy and as I shot him you naded me. I saw team killed by Bommando. Right after that I lost my connection.

SgtDuke · 09-23-2005, 11:37 AM

LOL, great writing Bom, that is an epic tale.

Trooper · 09-23-2005, 12:27 PM

did ne one else read that and hear bommando's voice telling it....UltraBom sounds like the uber squad of BF2

Preston85 · 09-23-2005, 12:35 PM

I saw someone on USMC type to all "If you see Bommando sneaking about give us a shout"

So I guessed he was up to something, good tale.

p.s. Beatniks squad was in that North West section so was proberlly us you helped to knife those pesky snipers. I notace I'm standing over your body in one of those screenshots after avenging your death.

Beatnik · 09-23-2005, 01:44 PM

My favorite line was "the enemy snipers soon quivered in their leafy boots". hahaha

Yeah we were engaging a few snipers up there too. I had no idea we had the support of UB, or I would have pulled my guys back and engaged them elsewhere.

icky · 09-23-2005, 04:40 PM

Fun story. I was engaged in some sniper slaughter myself. I recognized some of those knife victims as ones who also felt the point of my knife. I wish I had grabbed a screenshot, because I had a moment where two snipers were side by side and I knifed both of them in quick succession. I guess the disadvantage of having a second sniper beside you is you don't hear the 3rd guy creeping up.

It's so damn exciting when you get up in the hills and you hear that distinctive sound of a sniper rifle.

icky · 09-23-2005, 04:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Preston85

p.s. Beatniks squad was in that North West section so was proberlly us you helped to knife those pesky snipers. I notace I'm standing over your body in one of those screenshots after avenging your death.

With the pistol, no less!

Preston85 · 09-23-2005, 05:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by icky

With the pistol, no less!

i got you and the other guy with 1 clip of my Anti Tank rifle (PP-17 i think)..... its hard enough to get a hit with that thing! nevermind the 10 hits to kill something.

munchkin · 09-23-2005, 07:00 PM

"CRUSH BOM SQUAD!!1 The Story of How Jepzilla, Munchkin and One Blackhawk Made Ultrablue into a Human Pancake"

What follows is the epic story of brave men, exposing themselves to the enemy, with only their leafy boots to protect them. Singlehandedly, they, proud defenders of freedom, justice, honour and government-subsidised healthcare, would make the ultimate sacrifice (many times due to that evil evil commander scan) for the good of their nation and team.
The heroes were many (mainly due to the fact that we never bothered to lock the squads) but the names that will live on in the mists of time are Jepzilla and Munchkin. Note the underlining, which is far more attractive to the ladies than just caps.

Hearing reports from their fellow teammembers of 2 horribly disfigured men unsubtly bunnyhopping their way across the landscape, they noted that some fools had wasted their bricks of C4 on their commander assets! The men struggled to control their mirth as they lay in their sniper positions, as they had no commander who would use such things.

Over the open radio a rivalry had been born. A rivalry where one side (the side without Jepzilla and Munchkin) would fail miserably and be utterly destroyed. Bommando had foolishly begun a war of words, and he and Ultrablue would pay the price. The price of being shot in the head repeatedly at long distance (if you didn't get the hint).

But first our heroes would have to locate UltraBom before they could put the leaf-boot smackdown on them. Hmm..this would require a CUNNING PLAN, one unparalled in deviousness. It was Munchkin's turn to shine.He flicked on his radio:
Munchkin: Bommando, where are you?
Bommando: Uh.....wha?
Munchkin: I need to know where you are
Bommando: Why?
Munchkin: For completely non-killing purposes.
Bommando: ...I don't like the sound of those non-killing purposes
Munchkin: Aw...c'mon...I..uh..want to give you a hug
*silence on the radio*

Blast! The plan had failed. But surely Bommando would crack soon enough and reveal his location. In the meantime, Jepzilla,Munchkin and other squaddies would spend time on another worthy cause - blowing off Deveran's head.
It was a cracking success.

munchkin · 09-23-2005, 07:18 PM

"CRUSH BOM SQUAD!!1 The Story of How Jepzilla, Munchkin and One Blackhawk Made Ultrablue into a Human Pancake"
Part 2:
Our heroes rained devastation in the form of sniper bullets, and when the rifles ran out of ammo, pistol bullets. In the mean time, however, the sadistic and evil Ultrablue and Bommando had been deployed to the rear of the snipers. They attempted to destroy the snipers brutally and inhumanely with savage knives (they didn't have the refinement to use shock-paddles). In the course of the battle, the snipers had a great success - shooting Bommando in the face, further disfiguring his visage.

Here I feel I owe the readers some explanation. "How did Ultrablue and Bommando get to the heroic, brilliant and attractive snipers undetected?" you ask. The answer is simple. Their sheer hideousness temporarily blinded us. Honest.

Coming back to life at the carrier, and seeing a spare blackhawk, the snipers made a series of other incursions into enemy territory, capping a number of flags, and heroically destroying an APC.

But the Bommando menace was still lurking. Jepzilla, the creative genius, hit on a plan. "Bommando, thou yeasty reeling-ripe ratsbane! We shall crush thee with our sophisticated flying death machine!"

Thus, the Crush Bom squad was born.
On the way to Bommando's location, Jepzilla used his expert piloting skills to deploy his squadmates carefully onto the hillside, leaving only himself and Munchkin inside.Armaments? Our heroes didn't need no stinkin' armaments! Munchkin tried to squash troops with his engineer mines, while Jepzilla saw an enemy soldier sprinting for his life.
Squish.
Scream.
Laughter.
A howl of outrage on the open radio channel.

Returning home, flying in to the sunset (as all heroes do), Jepzilla and Munchkin knew that Bommando and Ultrablue were too scared to move, and in this they were correct. Ultrablue and Bommando, cowardly in nature, sat in the long grass, petrified and holding each other for comfort.

Friends and enemies, memorise this story, commit it to your hearts. For if you ever see a blackhawk with 2 men in it, you will know to run for safety, as fast as your legs can carry you.

But if you see a ROFLCOPTER, that's a completely different story. I mean, it's Deveran. No problemo. Heh, you know I'm joking buddy.

munchkin · 09-23-2005, 08:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Preston85

I saw someone on USMC type to all "If you see Bommando sneaking about give us a shout"

So I guessed he was up to something, good tale.

Yep, that was me. We had all our spies and intelligence operating on full steam.

ultrablue · 09-23-2005, 08:11 PM

Nice write up of our entertaining round Bom and Munchkin. =D

09-23-2005, 02:47 AM	#1 (permalink)
Bommando Registered User Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Sydney, Australia Age: 30 Posts: 4,294	ASSASSINS!!1 A Story of Courage and Valour Note: Some parts of this story may have been exaggerated to paint the protagonists in a brighter light. What follows is a graphic novel telling tales of great heroism behind enemy lines. Two men, the weight of the world on their shoulders sought to dual-handedly infiltrate enemy territory on a mission fraught with grave danger. The heroes in question were known by their callsigns "Ultrablue" and "Bommando", hereafter referred to collectively as "UltraBom". Note the studly caps. The tale starts with Ultrablue setting up his covert "Assassins" squad while he waited for his accomplice Bommando to get off the phone and join the Tactical Gamer Battlefield 2 server. He felt compelled to lock the squad for fear of exposing other unsuspecting team mates to extreme danger. This is a burden he could not bear, since the task that followed required unprecedented skill and covert action. Bommando paradropped into the Daqing Oilfields to aid Ultrablue in his mission of disruption and destruction. Despite being outnumbered by a stoic defence, our heroes convinced their enemies that they were being assaulted by a superior force. The evil Jepzilla held strong though, but UltraBom's job was done. They kept 6 men busy in fear of their 1337 skills. After receiving countless campaign accolades from their CO, UltraBom were airlifted to the Zatar Wetlands on a top secret mission of great importance: Render the enemy CO blind by sabotaging his valuable assets and prevent him from repairing them. The key was to remain unseen, refrain from entering enemy vehicles and engage only when they have been engaged themselves. UltraBom entered a Fast Attack Vehicle and made their way to a boat at the next CP in order to use the cover of water-filled canyons to execute their mission. The mission proceeded as planned until Ultrablue called for a toilet break while driving the RIB. He used a brick to keep the throttle down while he relieved himself over the side of the boat. Unfortunately, his negligence caused their transport to run aground. Ultrablue was UltraCrap and fled the scene, leaving Bommando in the driver's seat trying to get the boat to back up off the land. Bommando confiscated Ultrablue's keys and threw them into the marshes in disgust. After forgiving Ultrablue for jeopardising their their mission, Bommando suggested they walk 1km over the hills towards the enemy UCB. UltraBom hiked over the hilltops, using the opportunity to spot incoming enemy vehicles for their team, because that's just the kind of guys they are: team players through and through. After bickering about blisters and sore feet, the heroes finally reached their destination and were treated to a deceptively quiet vista of a friendly CP. Not having much time to stop and admire the view, UltraBom proceeded to negotiate the small stream next to the enemy UCB and plant their explosives first on the UAV and Radar so they wouldn't be revealed. They attached their C4 at each asset and simultaneously detonated their munitions to complete their task. Their mission was a roaring success, but they were surprised by the enemy engineers arriving from the aircraft carrier by boat to initiate repairs on the assets. Had the enemy not known who they were facing? Surely engaging UltraBom on equal terms would be certain suicide. Knowing that they must not engage the enemy unless they were themselves engaged or the enemy began repairing their assets, UltraBom lay in waiting for the right moment to strike. After a series of engagements with UltraBom, the enemy knew that they were outclassed in 1 on 1 combat, so they mounted their armoured vehicles which UltraBom had so courteously left vacant. Cowards. After a long game of cat and mouse, UltraBom were eventually flushed out and forced to fall back to the front lines where they were needed for yet another vital mission. Enemy snipers were tearing up our front line troops and were in dire need of support while they valiantly attempted to capture enemy Control Points. UltraBom knew that to engage a sniper face to face was suicide, so they employed diversion and surreptitious flanking manoeuvres to fulfil their task. One of them would spot enemy snipers and engage them from a distance while the other would silently flank them and slit their throat from behind. The technique proved very effective and the enemy snipers soon quivered in their leafy boots. Never knowing who would fall next, the snipers retreated and sought backup from vehicles. Even the evil mastermind Jepzilla fell victim to the UltraBom killing machine. Bommando fell briefly when he took on 3 snipers at once in hand to hand combat. Inhumanely shot in the face when all he was brandishing was a knife. His team mates showed their gratitude however, taking care of his assailant and reviving him to get back into the fight.

09-23-2005, 02:47 AM	#2 (permalink)
Bommando Registered User Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Sydney, Australia Age: 30 Posts: 4,294	Re: ASSASSINS!!1 A Story of Courage and Valour Too afraid to engage UltraBom in hand to hand combat again, Jepzilla returned with a Blackhawk in an attempt to thwart UltraBom's stranglehold on their forces. Unfortunately for Jepzilla, his squad was so afraid of their menacing power, they bailed from the helo and left Jepzilla alone without the ability to man armaments. Jepzilla futilely attempted to squash Ultrablue under the hull of the Blackhawk. Bommando soon rushed to his squadmate's aid by planting C4 around his pinned comrade. Jepzilla bugged out in the face of his imminent demise and limped off with his tail between his legs to track down yet more support to fight off this indomitable 2 man force. The enemy rolled in with 2 tanks and an APC to help the hapless Jepzilla, while he and his newly formed squad "SQUISH BOM" hovered aloft with their cowardly Miniguns. UltraBom were not deterred however. They stayed well hidden in the long grasses, becoming at one with nature, rendering themselves invisible to the hostile forces above and around them. The tanks did their mightiest to bring down the terrible twosome, but all UltraBom left behind them were the burning husks of those who dared to oppose them. So friends. Rest your eyes upon the exploits of the UltraBom 2 man army and quiver in your boots should you ever face them in battle. Pray they are either on your side or at least far away, for their knives will find you if you are close ... All images from this story have been scaled to fit most monitors. To view the screenshots at the size they were taken (1680 x 1050), click here. The images without prefixes are the originals.

09-23-2005, 08:55 AM	#3 (permalink)
jepzilla Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Halifax, Canada Age: 26 Posts: 1,232	Re: ASSASSINS!!1 A Story of Courage and Valour Haha. I was wondering why I only saw you and Ultrablue on Daqing. I was thinking, 'where's the other 4 guys?' in between asking the rest of my squad to hunt you all down. I've got to say though I think you two did a better job at killing my tank than the entire Chinese airforce! I spent the entire round dodging missiles, bombs and rockets. I got to see what air-to-ground missiles look like as they fly past. More than once. On Zataar, I wasn't going to hang around while the armor at your flag was shooting at me! I blackhawked Ultrablue, extracted my squad and bugged out without getting shot down. But if I had seen you on the ground I would have landed the blackhawk on you too, Bom! You need to bait your C4 traps better. :P I was thoroughly impressed by your knifing of me at the beginning of the round. I didn't think anybody would find me there. As for being an evil mastermind... well flattery will get you nowhere!

09-23-2005, 09:05 AM	#4 (permalink)
TG_Bubba Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: In the cell next to Icky. Age: 54 Posts: 5,929	Re: ASSASSINS!!1 A Story of Courage and Valour Nice, and they even play well with others. I was in Jaymind squad when you came in. I ran to the fixed AA where the chopper spawns to kill a guy and as I shot him you naded me. I saw team killed by Bommando. Right after that I lost my connection. __________________ Admin Graw 2-- Call of Duty Tactical Game Primer Call of Duty - Official Rules, Announcements & SOPs Have a problem? Need an admin? TG_Mateo: "Forget freedom, democracy, the blues, New York Pizza: our lasting contribution to human society is Bourbon." Sloppy Joe: "Don't play this game like you are on your own, because if you do... it might become a reality." kin3: "I'll try but I have the grandchildren all day today and if I'm not wiped out I'll play." Last edited by TG_Bubba; 09-23-2005 at 12:40 PM.

09-23-2005, 11:37 AM	#5 (permalink)
SgtDuke Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 1,355	Re: ASSASSINS!!1 A Story of Courage and Valour LOL, great writing Bom, that is an epic tale.

09-23-2005, 12:27 PM	#6 (permalink)
Trooper Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: In my wifes house......if she says i can Age: 25 Posts: 8,625	Re: ASSASSINS!!1 A Story of Courage and Valour did ne one else read that and hear bommando's voice telling it....UltraBom sounds like the uber squad of BF2 __________________ that sounds like a good idea trooper. -Vulcan

09-23-2005, 12:35 PM	#7 (permalink)
Preston85 Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: England Posts: 1,601	Re: ASSASSINS!!1 A Story of Courage and Valour I saw someone on USMC type to all "If you see Bommando sneaking about give us a shout" So I guessed he was up to something, good tale. p.s. Beatniks squad was in that North West section so was proberlly us you helped to knife those pesky snipers. I notace I'm standing over your body in one of those screenshots after avenging your death. Last edited by Preston85; 09-23-2005 at 02:09 PM.

09-23-2005, 01:44 PM	#8 (permalink)
Beatnik Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Austin, TX Age: 33 Posts: 4,320	Re: ASSASSINS!!1 A Story of Courage and Valour My favorite line was "the enemy snipers soon quivered in their leafy boots". hahaha Yeah we were engaging a few snipers up there too. I had no idea we had the support of UB, or I would have pulled my guys back and engaged them elsewhere. __________________ -F- Beatnik

09-23-2005, 04:40 PM	#9 (permalink)
icky Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Ottawa Valley Posts: 6,154	Re: ASSASSINS!!1 A Story of Courage and Valour Fun story. I was engaged in some sniper slaughter myself. I recognized some of those knife victims as ones who also felt the point of my knife. I wish I had grabbed a screenshot, because I had a moment where two snipers were side by side and I knifed both of them in quick succession. I guess the disadvantage of having a second sniper beside you is you don't hear the 3rd guy creeping up. It's so damn exciting when you get up in the hills and you hear that distinctive sound of a sniper rifle. __________________ Peace through fear... since 1947!

09-23-2005, 07:00 PM	#12 (permalink)
munchkin Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Sydney, Australia Age: 17 Posts: 2,271	Re: ASSASSINS!!1 A Story of Courage and Valour "CRUSH BOM SQUAD!!1 The Story of How Jepzilla, Munchkin and One Blackhawk Made Ultrablue into a Human Pancake" What follows is the epic story of brave men, exposing themselves to the enemy, with only their leafy boots to protect them. Singlehandedly, they, proud defenders of freedom, justice, honour and government-subsidised healthcare, would make the ultimate sacrifice (many times due to that evil evil commander scan) for the good of their nation and team. The heroes were many (mainly due to the fact that we never bothered to lock the squads) but the names that will live on in the mists of time are Jepzilla and Munchkin. Note the underlining, which is far more attractive to the ladies than just caps. Hearing reports from their fellow teammembers of 2 horribly disfigured men unsubtly bunnyhopping their way across the landscape, they noted that some fools had wasted their bricks of C4 on their commander assets! The men struggled to control their mirth as they lay in their sniper positions, as they had no commander who would use such things. Over the open radio a rivalry had been born. A rivalry where one side (the side without Jepzilla and Munchkin) would fail miserably and be utterly destroyed. Bommando had foolishly begun a war of words, and he and Ultrablue would pay the price. The price of being shot in the head repeatedly at long distance (if you didn't get the hint). But first our heroes would have to locate UltraBom before they could put the leaf-boot smackdown on them. Hmm..this would require a CUNNING PLAN, one unparalled in deviousness. It was Munchkin's turn to shine.He flicked on his radio: Munchkin: Bommando, where are you? Bommando: Uh.....wha? Munchkin: I need to know where you are Bommando: Why? Munchkin: For completely non-killing purposes. Bommando: ...I don't like the sound of those non-killing purposes Munchkin: Aw...c'mon...I..uh..want to give you a hug silence on the radio Blast! The plan had failed. But surely Bommando would crack soon enough and reveal his location. In the meantime, Jepzilla,Munchkin and other squaddies would spend time on another worthy cause - blowing off Deveran's head. It was a cracking success. __________________ [conduct][volun][drill][sg-c1][tpf-c1] \|TG-2nd\|munchkin Nec aspera terrent.

09-23-2005, 07:18 PM	#13 (permalink)
munchkin Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Sydney, Australia Age: 17 Posts: 2,271	Re: ASSASSINS!!1 A Story of Courage and Valour "CRUSH BOM SQUAD!!1 The Story of How Jepzilla, Munchkin and One Blackhawk Made Ultrablue into a Human Pancake" Part 2: Our heroes rained devastation in the form of sniper bullets, and when the rifles ran out of ammo, pistol bullets. In the mean time, however, the sadistic and evil Ultrablue and Bommando had been deployed to the rear of the snipers. They attempted to destroy the snipers brutally and inhumanely with savage knives (they didn't have the refinement to use shock-paddles). In the course of the battle, the snipers had a great success - shooting Bommando in the face, further disfiguring his visage. Here I feel I owe the readers some explanation. "How did Ultrablue and Bommando get to the heroic, brilliant and attractive snipers undetected?" you ask. The answer is simple. Their sheer hideousness temporarily blinded us. Honest. Coming back to life at the carrier, and seeing a spare blackhawk, the snipers made a series of other incursions into enemy territory, capping a number of flags, and heroically destroying an APC. But the Bommando menace was still lurking. Jepzilla, the creative genius, hit on a plan. "Bommando, thou yeasty reeling-ripe ratsbane! We shall crush thee with our sophisticated flying death machine!" Thus, the Crush Bom squad was born. On the way to Bommando's location, Jepzilla used his expert piloting skills to deploy his squadmates carefully onto the hillside, leaving only himself and Munchkin inside.Armaments? Our heroes didn't need no stinkin' armaments! Munchkin tried to squash troops with his engineer mines, while Jepzilla saw an enemy soldier sprinting for his life. Squish. Scream. Laughter. A howl of outrage on the open radio channel. Returning home, flying in to the sunset (as all heroes do), Jepzilla and Munchkin knew that Bommando and Ultrablue were too scared to move, and in this they were correct. Ultrablue and Bommando, cowardly in nature, sat in the long grass, petrified and holding each other for comfort. Friends and enemies, memorise this story, commit it to your hearts. For if you ever see a blackhawk with 2 men in it, you will know to run for safety, as fast as your legs can carry you. But if you see a ROFLCOPTER, that's a completely different story. I mean, it's Deveran. No problemo. Heh, you know I'm joking buddy. __________________ [conduct][volun][drill][sg-c1][tpf-c1] \|TG-2nd\|munchkin Nec aspera terrent.

09-23-2005, 08:11 PM	#15 (permalink)
ultrablue Join Date: Jul 2005 Age: 25 Posts: 471	Re: ASSASSINS!!1 A Story of Courage and Valour Nice write up of our entertaining round Bom and Munchkin. =D

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