Re: How about some common courtesy?

**Lorax74** · 03-28-2008, 01:18 PM

As long as the discussion remains civil and on track I see no reason to lock it down.

**BleedingKnee** · 03-28-2008, 02:43 PM

Originally Posted by Uranium - 235

Who you are, what your background is, and your personal issues are meaningless, unknown, and frankly, unwanted.

I completely disagree. I care about who you are, what your background is, and how you feel.

Originally Posted by Uranium - 235

I have enough **** to deal with without someone else's drama in my life.

I am sorry you are so angry Uranium. But please note that it is you that is bringing the drama. Fubar was asking people to be more courteous. I am sorry that you would take that personally.

**Lorax74** · 03-28-2008, 02:49 PM

Originally Posted by Uranium - 235

For the record, THIS is the community. Teamspeak. Forums. IRC (if we had one). The server is not the community.

Some would say that the server is an extension of the community while others say that the server is a product of the community. Either way, what happens here is generally reflected on the server and vice versa.

**big-eye101** · 03-28-2008, 03:01 PM

It is a sad truth you adress here! And you are so right about that!

We are a community we are supportiv, have a positiv attitued, want to have fun in a mature environment, we want to play team orientated, ... ... ...

Those are just some of the many great things TG stands for. Keep them in mind - especially on a bad day!

**Vortex421** · 03-28-2008, 04:35 PM

Once again, I'm showing up to this party late; my apologies.

I've spoken out about community before, about what I feel it is and what I feel it does. You already know my stance on community - that we are gathered here to do something that draws us all together and we do it for varying reasons - be it for competition practice or for fun. While TG is a community for mature gamers, I am not so sure that the issue at hand is that of maturity but, rather, diplomacy.

I do not deny or begrudge a person the right to speak their opinions or beliefs. But, as I tell those who I work with (I work as a call center quality analyst and coach, so I listen to agents taking calls and then provide them feedback and evaluate their progress), it's not what you say but how you say it. How you say something is a large part of diplomacy, with the other part being knowing when it is wise to say something and when it is best to say nothing.

As I pointed out in the thread regarding the Conquest server, it is far easier to attract flies with honey than vinegar. What does this mean, exactly? If you make a statement in a negative light, you are not as likely going to bring about what you want to accomplish than as if you were to say it in a more positive or constructive light or manner. (I am not pointing fingers here, FYI - I am making a simple statement that can apply to anyone and everyone) When you say something, be it in spoken words or written text, your own mindset is betrayed to everyone. A person who brings a negative mindset to the table is generally inflexible, unwilling to work with others to come to a resolution that is acceptable to everyone, and is far more difficult to reach. One who brings a constructive or positive mindset to the table, on the other hand, shows to everyone that they are willing to work with others to find a resolution that all can agree with.

Now, I'm not pointing fingers at anyone, calling anyone out, or placing the blame on any one set of shoulders. But I think that if people stop for a minute, reflect on how they're saying what they're trying to get across, and then look at whether or not that message is getting out in the way they want, things will right themselves.

I'd love to provide a much longer response to this thread, but I have been mulling this over for much of the day and writing as time and work allow.

**machowner** · 03-28-2008, 05:15 PM

Originally Posted by Uranium - 235

You said it yourself, this is a place for mature gamers. Maturity has absolutely NOTHING to do with complaining about everything being politically correct, assuming everything is a personal insult, or having skin so thin you could cut it with a 'yo mama' joke. I see 'maturity' thrown around in nearly every thread that turns awry, but I wonder if anyone actually understand what it means, what it implies. Maturity is actually the exact OPPOSITE. It's called being a grown-up and learning that you DON'T have a right to NOT be offended. I don't hang around people who get butt-hurt when I give them crap. Maybe I'm wrong in assuming everyone here DOES like those kind of people, but if someone seriously plays on our server, gets inspired to join the forums, and then quits in disgust because they saw "THE N WORD", frankly, would we miss them? I wouldn't want to play with someone patronizing me over voice chat about how I talk. Someone who is mature is going to say 'we have our differences, but it's not going to come between us'. Someone who is mature is going to think 'Why did he say that? Does he mean me? What is he really saying?' Someone who is mature is NOT going to read a 'mean word', smash the 'report' button, pound out a bunch of negative rep, and then start having a fit in the forum.

Maybe it is not maturity he was talking about, but just being respectful of others. Your right about the internet not being the best medium, but wrong about words. The problem is usually the writer. With so many great novels out there that easily express and induce the intended emotions and thoughts you can't say that words are a poor medium. It just takes a little time to think about who might be reading your post. At TG we are a bunch of gamers, both young and old play here. I don't feel that being mature is saying that you have the right to offend our younger players. This is pretty much all I wanted to say, I let my kids play at TG because of the maturity we have here.

**Uranium - 235** · 03-28-2008, 06:45 PM

Originally Posted by Lorax74

Some would say that the server is an extension of the community while others say that the server is a product of the community. Either way, what happens here is generally reflected on the server and vice versa.

It is somewhat and I anticipated this post. You can easily say someone who posts on the forum is part of the TG community, but are you going to say everyone who plays on the server is too? Not really.

**Lorax74** · 03-28-2008, 06:49 PM

Originally Posted by Uranium - 235

It is somewhat and I anticipated this post. You can easily say someone who posts on the forum is part of the TG community, but are you going to say everyone who plays on the server is too? Not really.

I prefer "not yet" over "not really".

**Mordona** · 03-28-2008, 06:50 PM

Server might not be part of the commuity, It's personal on how we view that aspect. But it is a part of TG and all rules and code follow from the forums to the server.

All in all, what does all this mean? Are you going to be friendly to new public players of TG, The pub hunting players, the vets, the admins, everyone else or are we going to show them a cold or worse, unrespectful shoulder?

We all play at TG by choice. We enjoy something that TG has to offer: Teamwork, Maturity, Enforced rules, Balanced play, real life tactics, wealth of knowledge, friendly community of players, and more. Personaly, I love every aspect. But if I didn't, I would have to respect it at the least to play here.

I'm not asking everyone to go out and "save a pubbie". You don't have to post happy-go-lucky posts or hold each others hand. You also dont have to be constructive, But don't be unconstructive. I'm not forcing anyone to enjoy any aspect of TG. But respecting every aspect of TG is my only demand. Keep it respectful on or off the server and forums.

Edit: I'm not implying that anyone is being disrespectful.

**roguesniper** · 03-28-2008, 07:34 PM

I happen to be new to TG and all i can say is that overall my initial experience with TG in general has been extremely positive and has made me a much better player. However i cant help but wonder if some have the lost the big picture, that this is a video game were talking about here, not real life, save the drama and have fun like its supposed to be. I think some people who play this game take it way too seriously and need to get a life. Just my two cents for what its worth. I was a police officer in NYC for 15 years and you want to get a taste of real life and real combat try putting that uniform on for 5 mins in one of the numerous ghettos of NYC. Im also quite positive there are members here that have been in the military and been in combat so im sure i am not alone in my opinion. Lets just have fun and use this as the distraction from real, crappy life it should be.

**Icehawk217** · 03-28-2008, 07:34 PM

Originally Posted by Uranium - 235

It is somewhat and I anticipated this post. You can easily say someone who posts on the forum is part of the TG community, but are you going to say everyone who plays on the server is too? Not really.

I personally think that the servers are one of the most important parts of the TG community. Everyone who plays there is part of the community because people play on our server, enjoy themselves, and THEN sign up at the website. The server is the very first view of our community that most anyone outside will see. That first step, playing on our server with awesome people is when someone becomes a member. Joining the forum and maybe becoming an SM is only second to the server. I personally felt like a part of the TG community months before i actually began wearing the |TG| tag.

So I would say that, so long as they play the TG way, any person who happens across the server is, or should be, considered part of our community.

**machowner** · 03-28-2008, 08:23 PM

I would have to agree, you could also argue that the forums are a product of the server. A server would be possible without the forums, but I would say that without a server there would be no forums.

**Uranium - 235** · 03-29-2008, 12:50 AM

That's like saying because I play on a clan's server, I'm part of that clan...

**Jimmy Jammer** · 03-29-2008, 02:22 AM

Interesting thread. I was one of the most outspoken and direct forward posters at my old community. So much so that I was labeled as abrasive and not sensitive to others feelings. After two years and many posts I came to the conclusion that if you are truthful with your statement and it is fact based and non-bias then in most cases you stand a chance of being non-offensive. In most cases though due to the inherent nature of the forums themselves if you apply any passion to your post inevitably someone will be offended. It seems that it is virtually impossible to have an opinion and stand your ground in a two dimensional world and not have your word taken out of context to a certain extent. I think that T/S is a better medium because you can at least hear the emotion that goes with a persons point of view. These forums seem to be inhabited by more mature people in general that most gaming boards. Although in the end it is not what we say but how we say it. Easy to understand and apply in real life but trying to have a passionate conversation/argument using this form of communication is difficult at best. I now write those types of posts in Word, read and reread it, and then decide what ramifications it will have on others after I post it. After causing many a locked thread and not really getting someone to understand your point kind of changes the way you write things which in turn makes you look at your attitude toward most of these topics. It is very easy to be courteous and have basic manners in life. It is equally easy to forget them when passion takes over logic and reason. At that point one might consider hitting the delete key a few times. Its late and I'm tired...the ramblings of an old man...JJ

**machowner** · 03-29-2008, 03:32 AM

Originally Posted by Uranium - 235

That's like saying because I play on a clan's server, I'm part of that clan...

It is no where near the same. Mainly because we are not talking about a clan server. TG is a community. We do not select our members. We welcome everyone who wants to play by the rules, act maturely, and be respectful of all player, new or old and not-so-great or exceptional players. That is what makes TG different from clans. We have no selection process. I know for a fact that there are many guys on the server who never made to the forums, but wear the TG tags and play be our rules. They also consider themselves a part of the community. Sure a clan server is different, but that again is why most of us chose TG.

Thread Tools

Display