The Birds

Hambergler · 11-27-2007, 07:20 PM

I have a horrible problem with birds crapping on my car. 40 - 60 turds nightly. They are up in a tree about 50 feet high and they are only there at night so I can't even see them. I have strung a plastic owl up there but it did nothing. I don't want to park on the street. And I don't want to cut the tree down, I'm afraid that if I just cut down the top branches with a cherry picker they will just move down to the next highest branch. I don't know what else to do, please help.

P.S. It is illegal to fire a shotgun within the city limits.

**Atomic Dog** · 11-27-2007, 07:29 PM

Find a good outdoor cat that hasn't been declawed. I would suggest a black cat as they tend to want to be active during the night time hours.

If not an animal, maybe a pellet gun?

Poisons would be too spotty and you might end up killing more than the birds.

What kind of birds are these? Crows? Pigeons? A variety pack?

**FPS_Douglas** · 11-27-2007, 08:34 PM

It's your fault, deal with it. That bird you hit with your car 3 years ago.... he was a popular bird. Be careful if you go out to the midwest or Canada as very large, predatorial birds can be found there. Not only is their **** bigger, but they have much better eyesite for better aim, and can cut you with talons..

**El_Gringo_Grande** · 11-27-2007, 09:20 PM

Car cover.

**Ferris Bueller** · 11-28-2007, 12:26 AM

AK-47 with 3 mags of ammo on full auto into the tree. You'll kill a few. I believe they call it spray-n-pray in counter strike.

**Rincewind** · 11-28-2007, 12:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by El_Gringo_Grande

Car cover.

qft

Hambergler · 11-28-2007, 08:27 AM

Judging by the medley of turds there is a variety of birds up there. I don't have the patients to be futzing with a car cover. I need to outsmart them some how.

**Atomic Dog** · 11-28-2007, 09:34 AM

Are there any other trees nearby that are not over your car? Perhaps putting bird feeders in those trees will lure them out of the tree over your car.

**TheSkudDestroyer** · 11-28-2007, 09:42 AM

I would suggest buying a slip cover, but it would have to be washed everyday or you would run a risk of getting sick.

Are they attracted to shiny things?

ScratchMonkey · 11-28-2007, 10:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ferris Bueller

AK-47 with 3 mags of ammo on full auto into the tree. You'll kill a few. I believe they call it spray-n-pray in counter strike.

Trash bag full of hydrogen and a fuse. Or maybe a remote detonator.

If you go with a car cover, be sure to use one with a glossy lining, so you can shake it clean on your neighbor's car.

Hambergler · 11-28-2007, 11:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Atomic Dog

Are there any other trees nearby that are not over your car? Perhaps putting bird feeders in those trees will lure them out of the tree over your car.

Although I like the direction your going, I think it would encourage more crapping. They fly around the neighborhood all day and then they come home to roost in the branches above my car. I have to make them think sleeping there is a bad idea.

**Atomic Dog** · 11-28-2007, 11:39 AM

Yeah, I don't know that there really is any solution outside of introducing some kind of predator, poison, or by simply removing their home. Unfortunate, bird crap is so foul! bah dum dum!

westyfield · 11-28-2007, 01:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Atomic Dog

Yeah, I don't know that there really is any solution outside of introducing some kind of predator, poison, or by simply removing their home. Unfortunate, bird crap is so foul! bah dum dum!

Oh deary me.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Atomic Dog

Are there any other trees nearby that are not over your car? Perhaps putting bird feeders in those trees will lure them out of the tree over your car.

Try putting the feeder in the tree that is over a car belonging to a neighbor you dislike!

**kin3** · 11-28-2007, 04:39 PM

Strobe light, like you see in a hanger.

**MagnaCentipede** · 11-28-2007, 06:04 PM

Remove the tree? Poisoned feeder? Make a one-way-door trap out of a birdcage with feed inside... then throw the cage into a swimming pool.

11-27-2007, 07:20 PM	#1 (permalink)
Hambergler Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Houston, TX Age: 33 Posts: 1,034	The Birds I have a horrible problem with birds crapping on my car. 40 - 60 turds nightly. They are up in a tree about 50 feet high and they are only there at night so I can't even see them. I have strung a plastic owl up there but it did nothing. I don't want to park on the street. And I don't want to cut the tree down, I'm afraid that if I just cut down the top branches with a cherry picker they will just move down to the next highest branch. I don't know what else to do, please help. P.S. It is illegal to fire a shotgun within the city limits. __________________

11-27-2007, 07:29 PM	#2 (permalink)
Atomic Dog Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Michigan Age: 31 Posts: 3,995	Re: The Birds Find a good outdoor cat that hasn't been declawed. I would suggest a black cat as they tend to want to be active during the night time hours. If not an animal, maybe a pellet gun? Poisons would be too spotty and you might end up killing more than the birds. What kind of birds are these? Crows? Pigeons? A variety pack? __________________ \| ArmA SOPs \| PCS SOPs \| TG Primer \| 4th Wiki \| Ikariam Info: Mothership \| Parliament \| Chocolate City \| Saint George

11-27-2007, 08:34 PM	#3 (permalink)
FPS_Douglas Join Date: Jul 2005 Age: 33 Posts: 553	Re: The Birds It's your fault, deal with it. That bird you hit with your car 3 years ago.... he was a popular bird. Be careful if you go out to the midwest or Canada as very large, predatorial birds can be found there. Not only is their **** bigger, but they have much better eyesite for better aim, and can cut you with talons..

11-27-2007, 09:20 PM	#4 (permalink)
El_Gringo_Grande Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: OKIE HOMY Age: 39 Posts: 2,324	Re: The Birds Car cover. __________________ Sen. John McCain (AZ) For President '08 --- I’m not racists, I have republican friends. Radio show host. - "The essence of tyranny is the denial of complexity". -Jacob Burkhardt - "A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds" - Emerson - "People should not be afraid of it's government, government should be afraid of it's People." - Line from V for Vendetta - If software were as unreliable as economic theory, there wouldn't be a plane made of anything other than paper that could get off the ground. Jim Fawcette

11-28-2007, 12:26 AM	#5 (permalink)
Ferris Bueller Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Orlando, FL Age: 26 Posts: 4,829	Re: The Birds AK-47 with 3 mags of ammo on full auto into the tree. You'll kill a few. I believe they call it spray-n-pray in counter strike. __________________ \|TG-6th\|Ferris Bueller Important TG Reading \| Support TG - Become a Supporting Member \| TacticalWiki - Your TG Guide Kicked/Banned? READ THIS FIRST! \| Complete list of TG Admins \| Think Someone Did A Good Job? Nominate Them For a Ribbon! Report Problem Players/Appeal Your Ban \| Learn TG - The TG Mentoring Program __________________ "Never underestimate the power of human stupidity." -Lazarus Long

11-28-2007, 08:27 AM	#7 (permalink)
Hambergler Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Houston, TX Age: 33 Posts: 1,034	Re: The Birds Judging by the medley of turds there is a variety of birds up there. I don't have the patients to be futzing with a car cover. I need to outsmart them some how. __________________

11-28-2007, 09:34 AM	#8 (permalink)
Atomic Dog Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Michigan Age: 31 Posts: 3,995	Re: The Birds Are there any other trees nearby that are not over your car? Perhaps putting bird feeders in those trees will lure them out of the tree over your car. __________________ \| ArmA SOPs \| PCS SOPs \| TG Primer \| 4th Wiki \| Ikariam Info: Mothership \| Parliament \| Chocolate City \| Saint George

11-28-2007, 09:42 AM	#9 (permalink)
TheSkudDestroyer Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: NY Posts: 2,982	Re: The Birds I would suggest buying a slip cover, but it would have to be washed everyday or you would run a risk of getting sick. Are they attracted to shiny things? __________________ \|TG-6th\|Skud, NA Deputy Lead Tester -F- Skudly To Hell and Back: The untold story of having your Dick Blonov ?uestlove just murdered me \| I love TG - You do too!

11-28-2007, 11:39 AM	#12 (permalink)
Atomic Dog Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Michigan Age: 31 Posts: 3,995	Re: The Birds Yeah, I don't know that there really is any solution outside of introducing some kind of predator, poison, or by simply removing their home. Unfortunate, bird crap is so foul! bah dum dum! __________________ \| ArmA SOPs \| PCS SOPs \| TG Primer \| 4th Wiki \| Ikariam Info: Mothership \| Parliament \| Chocolate City \| Saint George

11-28-2007, 04:39 PM	#14 (permalink)
kin3 Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Mobile, Al Age: 62 Posts: 1,141	Re: The Birds Strobe light, like you see in a hanger. __________________ The Old Guy kin3

11-28-2007, 06:04 PM	#15 (permalink)
MagnaCentipede Join Date: May 2007 Posts: 1,897	Re: The Birds Remove the tree? Poisoned feeder? Make a one-way-door trap out of a birdcage with feed inside... then throw the cage into a swimming pool. __________________

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