Re: Programmer jokes

**Acreo Aeneas** · 09-11-2009, 07:34 PM

LOL...obsessive stalker.

**El_Gringo_Grande** · 09-11-2009, 10:36 PM

I vacillate between nerd and dweeb. Unless I am dumber than I think, then I am just a dork.

**ScratchMonkey** · 09-11-2009, 10:46 PM

This is just sad:

http://thedailywtf.com/Articles/The-...-Selector.aspx

**El_Gringo_Grande** · 09-11-2009, 11:19 PM

Originally Posted by ScratchMonkey

This is just sad:

http://thedailywtf.com/Articles/The-...-Selector.aspx

I saw that today.

When I see something like I am actually impressed. There is know way in hell I would ever put that much work into a simple select list.

I have worked with programmers that would do stuff like that. They had no problem spending an hour to write hundreds of lines of code to do something simple.

I prefer to spend hours figuring out how to do it easier because I figure that the knowledge gained will save mucho time in the future.

I am just wayyyy to lazy. I have often wondered if laziness contributes positivly to intelligence.

**Fruvous** · 09-11-2009, 11:24 PM

That's scary. I don't think I know anyone who would do that.

**Acreo Aeneas** · 09-11-2009, 11:56 PM

Originally Posted by ScratchMonkey

This is just sad:

http://thedailywtf.com/Articles/The-...-Selector.aspx

*shivers down my spine*

I'd be tempted to shorten all that code. I'd be pulling out my hair if I had to go through all of that just for one stupid mistake.

**ScratchMonkey** · 09-12-2009, 02:14 PM

The problem isn't that the code exists, but that a human wrote it. It's not that uncommon for such logic to be machine-generated. It's similar to a table-driven system. In this case one is likely to see a severe performance decrease given the context it will be run in, but in some systems it can make sense to trade space for time, using lots of memory to get a fast lookup of an answer instead of computing it each time.

I prefer to spend hours figuring out how to do it easier because I figure that the knowledge gained will save mucho time in the future.

I am just wayyyy to lazy. I have often wondered if laziness contributes positivly to intelligence.

I like to put it this way: Necessity is not the mother of invention. Laziness is.

But there's smart laziness and dumb laziness. Dumb laziness is not doing the job. Smart laziness is doing it in a way that minimizes effort, and possibly doing more work up front to save lots of work in the future. (There's also the smart workaholic and the dumb workaholic. I'll take the dumb lazy guy over the dumb workaholic. The latter guy makes too many messes for me to clean up.)

**Greyed** · 09-13-2009, 09:14 AM

Originally Posted by Fruvous

Perl would be Voodoo

Oh so true. Even more so when you just don't meddle in someone else's Voodoo... er... Perl code. *shudder*

Python would be Humanism:

Completely true as well. Though Pythonistas don't quibble about Python being a programming language whereas Humanists might bristle at Humanism being called a religion.

I went from Voodoo to Humanism with some side dabbles in Judaism. And WTH!? No Pascal? How could ya forget Pascal? >.<

Originally Posted by El_Gringo_Grande

I am just wayyyy to lazy. I have often wondered if laziness contributes positivly to intelligence.

Since I started out (approximately) in Voodoo I can say that the head priest(?) seems to believe so. In the preface to the original v5 Camel book he said "The three chief virtues of a programmer are: Laziness, Impatience and Hubris."

Oh, and further proof that Perl is Voodoo.

Code:

str->str_pok |= SP_FBM;                     /* deep magic */
s = (unsigned char*)(str->str_ptr);         /* deeper magic */

--Larry Wall in util.c from the perl source code

**El_Gringo_Grande** · 09-13-2009, 11:19 AM

Originally Posted by Greyed

And WTH!? No Pascal? How could ya forget Pascal? >.<

Very good point. Wasn't much pre Mac OS X done with pascal? What is a religion that is invisible to the masses that worships the things it produces?

More of a cult, really.

**Greyed** · 09-13-2009, 12:32 PM

Originally Posted by El_Gringo_Grande

Very good point. Wasn't much pre Mac OS X done with pascal? What is a religion that invisible to the masses that worships the things it produces?

More of a cult, really.

.....

Well, that's too easy.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cargo_cult

And for irony...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cargo_cult_programming

**Acreo Aeneas** · 09-14-2009, 12:37 AM

Cargo cult programming is a style of computer programming that is characterized by the ritual inclusion of code or program structures that serve no real purpose. Cargo cult programming is typically symptomatic of a programmer not understanding either a bug he or she was attempting to solve or the apparent solution (compare shotgun debugging, voodoo programming).[1] The term may also apply when an unskilled or novice computer programmer (or one not experienced with the problem at hand) copies some program code from one place and pastes it into another place, with little or no understanding of how the code works, or if it is required in its new position.

Reminds me of a few classmates in one of my intro programming courses. Though, this is the first time I've heard it termed as "cargo cult programming".

**ScratchMonkey** · 09-15-2009, 08:59 PM

I, Cyborg
http://abstrusegoose.com/171

**El_Gringo_Grande** · 09-17-2009, 12:19 PM

The goal of Computer Science is to build something that will last at least until we’ve finished building it.

Anonymous

**Fruvous** · 09-17-2009, 12:32 PM

The above.
Programmers are lazy. We're lazy to do things once well and never have to think hard again.

**Rivengard** · 09-17-2009, 03:16 PM

Regular Stack Overflow residents might be familiar with this, but I decided to share this anyway. They decided to mold the guy with the highest contribution points into the figure of the great Chuck. http://meta.stackoverflow.com/questi...on-skeet-facts

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