I was gonna quit the beta server and focus on alpha...but
I wanted to go out with a bang. So I attacked the Band of Butters alliance to start a war. It worked and is so much fun I can't quit now.
Here's some of the fun (I'll be He said and they can be She said)
She said:
"Please return all stolen goods from Doomy immediately. An attack force is on its way. The ships are paddle wheel rams and are the first of many if you do not comply. Following the paddle wheels will by gyrocopters that will take all you own. I strongly recommend you send doomy his resources back in full."
He said:
Tempting offer but no thanks. I kinda like the stuff.
She said:
"That's no problem. I'll alert the others in the alliance to your decision."
He said:
ok, I'll stock my warehouse with doomy's stuff for you to loot.
She said:
"At this point looting isn't my goal. After someone attacks and refuses diplomacy, it is important to lock down all colonies of that player until governor is properly initialized and we can occupy his towns. So far every player has just quit the game, but I encourage you to continue struggling as it will give me a chance to test out my new units"
He said:
wow! nice setup!
checked out your garrison and warehouse.
lot's of marble but you need sulfer for a ton more of those archers, flamethrowers, gyro's and catapults.
With 4 islands it shouldn't be a problem I'd guess.
(hit doomy like 5 more times so far because he didn't talk to me before calling in his guard dogs. That and it's taking you so damn long to get here.)
She said:
"Naw resources aren't a problem and haven't been for a while. I don't think I'll need too much more sulfur though other than the stuff I have en route to my capital. You're score is extremely low in all aspects lol, I don't think you'll pose any more trouble than the last four people that attacked my friends."
He said:
Why are you giving me all this time to resupply and redeploy?
I thought I was locked down...
She said:
"Because I want you to spend your money on ships and troops so that I can kill them again. Anyway, we're waiting on a more permanent solution in the form of a bashing ban."
He said:
Why let us build war machines if we're not supposed to battle?
I'm not spending my money anyways. I'm spending Doomy's money.
I lost some ships on one island and lost 0 troops in those battles.
How much did it cost to send all that 15 hours away to come back with a few gold pieces? Didn't cost me a penny.
She said:
"Well I guess that's something you and the mod will have to chat about when he reads the message. You have made several attempts to get me riled up by saying "I'm using doomy's stuff - hyuck!" but it really doesn't affect me because anything you take from him is easily replaced. Oh, and the smiley-faced sarcasm comes off pretty creepy in an "I'm going to get alone with your children tonight" kind of way - as you grow and develop you might want to ditch that confrontation handling technique."
He said:
Not a problem. See, I never attacked you at all. I attacked Doomy. You jumped in and threatened me.
I also never insulted or attacked your charecter as you just did.
If the mod contacts me I'll just send him all our messages and he'll see what's up.
If anyone would get banned it would be you.
(I was then banned for 2 days for attacking xdoomyx 15 times in 24 hours) *shrug*
She said:
"Haha, not according to the rules. Also, when you attack someone in an alliance, you are pretty much asking to be attacked in return. Expecting to be able to attack someone in an alliance with no chance of being attacked back is enough to make any player of any game chuckle.
Read the rules carefully. Only one rule has been broken by either of us, and it is the bashing rule (attacking a town over 6 times in a 24 hour period). This is also one of the few rules that is regularly enforced with a ban. I am unsure, however, as to whether they will look into your .org account or not. A screenshot was taken of the battle reports and sent to a mod.
If you are not banned for breaking the rules, I will place a bounty on your head so that I can move on to someone else after I tire of attacking you. (the bounty will be placed in strict compliance with the rules)"
He said:
Wow. I may HAVE broken that rule...
I thought it would only LET you attack 6 times in 24 hours. Now I know.
I attacked Doomy BECAUSE he's in a big alliance and I wanted to get into a war because I was getting bored.
I figured he'd fight back but he has no defense.
He should be playing the Sims or something.
She said:
"haha naw, he was just focusing on building up his towns and not so much on military. Attempting to antagonize people because you are bored has got to be a pretty poor reflection of one's character."
He said:
Kinda sad really when you think about it.
He runs to you crying... you run to the mod crying...
Your alliance is a fine tuned war machine.
You must be so proud.
She said:
"Oh noes, you're one of the kids that calls every form of confrontation "crying"?! Haha there's one in every game it seems. "Uh oh, I'm outsmarted and overpowered - I know, let's tell them they're CRYING - LOL"
I haven't told anyone else in the alliance yet about you because I don't want to bother them. Frankly it would be like trying to squash a fly with a steamroller."
He said:
Yet I'm still here and you're having the mod do your work for you.
Crying is when you avoid confrontation and tell mommy to handle your battle for you. Exactly like you and Doomy have done.
She said:
"Avoid confrontation huh? Like when I wiped out every ship you owned and made sure that one of your towns was clean of troops? Sounds to me like I was taking care of a pest in the short term while thinking ahead for the long term. I mean, if you saw a rat just chilling on your kitchen counter what would be the best way to deal with it? Catch the rat, get rid of it, AND call the exterminators. The word of the day is "efficient", not "crying". If you disagree you'll have to take it up with grover."
He said:
you wiped out most (still had 3 ballista left) ships in one town. You didn't kill a single troop.
There were no troops, ships, or materials @ Camp Striker and Fort Striker.
That's efficient? paying a fortune to clear empty towns?
That's what I call hilarious.
She said:
"Oh 3 ballista ships huh? lmao. I feel like I have to repeat myself a lot with you; I don't care about money or resources. I attack you simply because you are a pest to my friend. The money I spend might seem like a fortune to your tiny villages, but it is hardly even pocket change to me."
He said:
Isn't your alliance supposed to be the exterminator? You called the governor because you saw a rat on your counter. You tried to scare it away but it just sat there and kept nibbling.
Now poor Doomy thinks the coast is clear so he's sending 5 ballista and 5 ramships to their deaths.
Good stuff.
She said:
"When I go on the forums I always see someone whining about not being able to destroy an enemy's city, but you're living proof that we can! If you attack someone enough, they will get demoralized and abandon their towns like you did. Some of them make it very easy by bashing someone in a sad attempt to antagonize and get themselves banned. You spent a lot of time mocking us for the resources you took, yet you ended up losing far more in the long run. We will continue to attack you until you abandon your last town. You could always move to a different server, or delete your account on this server and make a new one; we just don't want you here."
He said:
You give yourself way too much credit. Those towns were empty long before I started this war. Only reason I didn't abandon them earlier is because I thought it would be funny to watch you guys waste money attacking them. It was hilarious.
You havn't cost me anything but a few cheap ships.
I don't even keep what I loot from doomy. I ship it off to random people.
Donated over 100k gold to the island. I just attack him to annoy you and it works like a charm.
She said:
"haha you can contort it anyway you like; you were banned and now you have only one town. Only one town to go!"
She said: (out of turn)
"I am sure you will be deleting your town soon or going inactive, seeing as doomy is big enough to defend himself now and you have run out of citizens for me to slaughter. I bid you farewell, and hope that you have better luck on other servers than you did on this one."
He said:
ah, sorry man. You're gonna need to keep attacking me. Doomy still can't defend himself.
He said: (out of turn)
you have spy defense now! I'm flattered.
She said:
"haha they aren't for you; I don't care what you know about my towns. The spies are for defending against an alliance we may be going to war with lol. The less they know, the more likely they are to attack"
He said:
I tried to join your alliance because it seemed funny but took too long so I formed an alliance myself so I could avoid the bashing rule but I think I need another member before I could declare war on you. Wanna lend me someone so I can start bashing doomy?
She said:
"Haha now this could get interesting. Who are you going to doom by inviting them to your alliance?"
He said:
Hoping someone that wants to quit the server but wants to go out with a bang. I'll be shocked if anyone joins. I'm not going to invite any of my friends, that's for sure. Only slingers and alot of time can take down such a formidable opponent.
...the end (so far)...
I then sent the following to everyone on my Island:
'Hi, I'm sending this message to everyone on this Island.
I'm fighting xdoomyx's alliance and have been for several weeks. I use as many slingers as I can make and attack him 6 times a day when I can. The leader of his alliance attacks me daily also but he sends his ships from 15 hours a day and doesn't get hardly any loot for his troubles. I'll be continuing this cycle so feel free to attack him without much fear of retaliation. I've gotten under their skin and they don't have the action points to attack everyone so it's open season with no worries. I keep xdoomyx pretty dry on supplies, but you can loot alot of gold. (his wall will eat 4 slingers so I send 14 each time.)'
(I'm not with TGA on beta server, only alpha and I behave there)
