Tales of Computer Idiocy

Switch · 08-07-2008, 11:15 AM

Most of us here know a thing or two about computers and software and that means most of here have served as someones personal tech support probono. If you worked as a tech then you definately have some stories. Lets hear of your attempts to help the computer illiterate without talking down to them (unless you actually did!)

This brief write up got me on this idea....
http://thedailywtf.com/Articles/The-Dream-Customer.aspx

**Quest Shady** · 08-07-2008, 11:37 AM

You are bringing back flashbacks!!!

I play Tech Support for...friends, family and their friends and family. Sometimes you have to know when to say NO! Or charge more money!

I used to work for Software Spectrum about 8 years ago. They were an outsourced tech support company for AOL. SO yes I was an AOL tech support person back when broad band was not as common as it is now.

I have lots of stories of people and their computers....LOL! I will just have to refresh my memory on some of them and come back with the stories.

But for now I will share this Video that a friend sent me the other day!

Careful...There is a couple swear words!

**Spulat** · 08-07-2008, 11:38 AM

I work with Small Business clients every day, with just about every aspect of their network (though sadly, not as frequently as I'd like to with the Cisco equipment). The mere idea of having to work someone else's tech support, even for the "Other", just boils my blood

I helped my best friend build a rig one time, and ended up being his free tech support for EVERYTHING. Luckily, he took it upon himself to learn things, so he's a solid knowledgeable user now. Enough where I rarely need to intervene.

Switch · 08-07-2008, 06:10 PM

I'll share one of my own.

Frosh/Soph year in college I worked at best buy as a computer tech/geek squad (there was no geek sqd whe I first started workign there) and a customer came in trying to return/exchange an external hd. The service manager refused the return, but I felt like this guy was getting ripped off. I went ahead and ok'd the return anyway.

The customer selected another external hd and bought it.

A few days later he returns with the exchanged new HD he purchased.... here's the problem.

It seems that his replacement HD was not new. It was someone else's return as it had data on it. The previous owner used the HD. He put child porn on the HD. He stored some of his own credit info on the HD.

The customer who bought it was a cop. LoL. Stupid stupid stupid man didn't format the hd before returning it! by authorizing that return I ended up assisting in an arrest, lol.

Not so much tech support, but stupid computer behavior nonetheless

ScratchMonkey · 08-07-2008, 06:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Quest Shady

But for now I will share this Video that a friend sent me the other day!

Which was posted to the video thread a few weeks ago, to rave reviews from other TG'ers. Be sure to watch this one.

Google for "BOFH", lots of good sites with tech support stories under that heading.

**DrakenViator** · 08-09-2008, 01:57 AM

I work as a sales associate for an office supply store. Well one time I had a customer call in on the phone looking for an ink cartridge for her Windows 98 computer, no joke. I believe her exact words were, "I have Windows 98, what black ink cartridge do I need?"

Well I managed to talk the customer into opening her printer and pulling out the cartridge, then getting her to read off the model number. To which she first read off the manufacturing date stamped on the bottom. I then directed her to the sticker on the top of the cartridge which gave me the model number for the HP 56 black ink that she needed...

That was a fun one...

Oh and I HATE having to tell customers that Windows does not equal Office. I actually had a customer call to find out prices to upgrade her version of Windows because she needed Excel and her current copy of Windows didn't include it. It took me almost TEN minutes to explain it to her because,'her other Windows included Excel.'

Oh I could go on for DAYS!

~ Draken

**Sir-Nerd** · 08-09-2008, 03:59 PM

I hate when people think brands are the most inportant thing in the world. I had a friend come over and look at the house. He saw my sisters and mom's Dells next to my gaming machine and started boasting about his computer being a way better than mine. I've always took the front plate off my case to allow better air circulation, and in the process, disguising it as a POS computer.

Whenever i ask my friends what type of computer it is i always get "It's a Dell" or "It a windows XP.\

My biggest peeve is that my sister and mother are completely ignorant about technology and they ignore me and dad's solutions to there computer problems. My sister thinks that if i install a 1 gigabyte game on her computer for a LAN party on her 500 gig harddrive, it'll slow her computer down.

MrMojay · 08-09-2008, 04:12 PM

Facilities in my job were called by an office person saying her "cup holder" was broken, so out of curiosity they went up to her desk and could not see the cup holder so they wondered where it was, the lady said "look it wont work" and pressed the eject button on the cd-rom drive, it was probably welded to the insides covered in tea and coffee and god knows what else.

FatCobra · 08-09-2008, 07:41 PM

Since you guys are PC Nerds, can you help me out? I can't find the "Any" key on my keyboard.

**El_Gringo_Grande** · 08-09-2008, 07:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by FatCobra

Since you guys are PC Nerds, can you help me out? I can't find the "Any" key on my keyboard.

Classic!

**Trooper** · 08-09-2008, 08:03 PM

Working in college as a PC/av tech i would every single Monday Wednesday and Friday be called down to the lecture hall at 7:30am. Same Prof same problem. And when i say prof he was like campus god so no one ever told him how to stop causing this problem. He would put his floppy disk in the PC then start it up......see the problem.

And every day after his classes my supervisor would get a phone call about how rude and slow i was getting the problem fixed and if i would just fix the PC he wouldnt have to keep calling me down every single class period.

He even went so far to make a big sence in class with me there, so i decided to give everyone a lesson on how to fix his problem. DO NOT PUT THE DISK IN BEFORE YOU START THE PC..and if he does you just eject it and press the space bar.

i got a stern talking to by my supervisor my supervisors boss and sir campus god about how rude i was....after words my super said i wasnt wrong and should have done that weeks ago.

**Quest Shady** · 08-09-2008, 09:47 PM

OK...
Working as AOL Tech Support I take a call...

"Thank You for calling AOL Technical Support for Windows...How can I Help you today."

My normal opening that I repeat over and over....and on this evening I get a gentleman telling me that he is having problems connecting to AOL. Which of course I am "SUPPOSED" to follow the Sherlock program that is supposed to walk me through each step and question all while trying to keep a low talk time...

OK Sir lets take a look at your setup. Is your computer on and running right now... YES? Good...and have you checked all the lines from the wall to the back of the modem and ensured that they are plugged into the right connections? OK Sir then lets check your setup...Please hit Start...Run....

What do you mean you can't right now....

He proceeded to inform me that he had walked 2 blocks to a pay phone to call me. When I asked why he did that he told me because if he called from the home phone then he wouldn't be able to try and sign on. He just wanted some ideas for me to give him to try so he could try and remember them and try them when he got back.

Um sir you could have called me from your house phone and I could have walked you through the steps...Then you could have tried signing on...

HE then explains to me...But then I couldn't sign on because I was on the phone and thats why I walked to this phone.

And you wonder why I had some headaches at the end of th e night.... I was so glad for the mute button at times because I was laughing so hard!!!

MrMojay · 08-10-2008, 12:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by FatCobra

Since you guys are PC Nerds, can you help me out? I can't find the "Any" key on my keyboard.

Mash it with your hands!...... that usually works!

Quote:

after words my super said i wasnt wrong and should have done that weeks ago.

Youuuu Lazy bugger!

**DrakenViator** · 08-13-2008, 01:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sir-Nerd

I hate when people think brands are the most inportant thing in the world...

Whenever i ask my friends what type of computer it is i always get "It's a Dell" or "It a windows XP..."

I built my current rig, so when people ask me what my PC is, I always say it is a Frankenstein... A part from here a part from there, throw it all together, give it a little juice and... 'IT'S ALIVE! ALIVE!'

Though that does bring up VERY many issues that I have with customers:

Customer: I need more memory for my computer
Me: Okay no problem, what type of memory does your computer support?
Customer: It's a Dell.
Me: Okay...

Normally I then ask a few questions about what version of Windows they have, or how old the PC is, stuff like that to try to narrow it down. Nine times out of ten (if not higher) I have to send the customer home to check because otherwise I have to take a random guess. Which I HATE having to do...

~Draken

**Sir-Nerd** · 08-13-2008, 10:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DrakenViator

I built my current rig, so when people ask me what my PC is, I always say it is a Frankenstein... A part from here a part from there, throw it all together, give it a little juice and... 'IT'S ALIVE! ALIVE!'

Both my computer are just that, a random hodgepodge of parts from several different brands. My previous computer had the front plate missing and the wires for the case cut up and hard wired into place just to start the damn thing.

08-07-2008, 11:15 AM	#1 (permalink)
Switch Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: NJ Posts: 1,236	Tales of Computer Idiocy Most of us here know a thing or two about computers and software and that means most of here have served as someones personal tech support probono. If you worked as a tech then you definately have some stories. Lets hear of your attempts to help the computer illiterate without talking down to them (unless you actually did!) This brief write up got me on this idea.... http://thedailywtf.com/Articles/The-Dream-Customer.aspx __________________ \|TG\|Switch Better known as: That noob who crashed the chopper. That noob who ran over the mine. That noob who TK'd me with a sniper rifle. That noob who hit that APC at 300m with light AT! Our APC...

08-07-2008, 11:37 AM	#2 (permalink)
Quest Shady Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Brandon, FL Age: 37 Posts: 808	Re: Tales of Computer Idiocy You are bringing back flashbacks!!! I play Tech Support for...friends, family and their friends and family. Sometimes you have to know when to say NO! Or charge more money! I used to work for Software Spectrum about 8 years ago. They were an outsourced tech support company for AOL. SO yes I was an AOL tech support person back when broad band was not as common as it is now. I have lots of stories of people and their computers....LOL! I will just have to refresh my memory on some of them and come back with the stories. But for now I will share this Video that a friend sent me the other day! Careful...There is a couple swear words! __________________ TG CS:S SOPs \|TG CS:S Admins \| SUPPORTING MEMBERSHIPS Health and Wellness are not accidents. Take Action Now! Last edited by Quest Shady; 08-07-2008 at 11:38 AM. Reason: WARNING: Couple of swear words!

08-07-2008, 11:38 AM	#3 (permalink)
Spulat Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: New Baltimore, MI Age: 27 Posts: 1,316	Re: Tales of Computer Idiocy I work with Small Business clients every day, with just about every aspect of their network (though sadly, not as frequently as I'd like to with the Cisco equipment). The mere idea of having to work someone else's tech support, even for the "Other", just boils my blood I helped my best friend build a rig one time, and ended up being his free tech support for EVERYTHING. Luckily, he took it upon himself to learn things, so he's a solid knowledgeable user now. Enough where I rarely need to intervene. __________________ 55th Infanty Division - "Your Late-Night Crew!" The TG Way: Respect and Maturity - \|TG-55th ID\| "I've got myself a new mantra, it says 'don't forget to have a good time!'" - Ani D.

08-07-2008, 06:10 PM	#4 (permalink)
Switch Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: NJ Posts: 1,236	Re: Tales of Computer Idiocy I'll share one of my own. Frosh/Soph year in college I worked at best buy as a computer tech/geek squad (there was no geek sqd whe I first started workign there) and a customer came in trying to return/exchange an external hd. The service manager refused the return, but I felt like this guy was getting ripped off. I went ahead and ok'd the return anyway. The customer selected another external hd and bought it. A few days later he returns with the exchanged new HD he purchased.... here's the problem. It seems that his replacement HD was not new. It was someone else's return as it had data on it. The previous owner used the HD. He put child porn on the HD. He stored some of his own credit info on the HD. The customer who bought it was a cop. LoL. Stupid stupid stupid man didn't format the hd before returning it! by authorizing that return I ended up assisting in an arrest, lol. Not so much tech support, but stupid computer behavior nonetheless __________________ \|TG\|Switch Better known as: That noob who crashed the chopper. That noob who ran over the mine. That noob who TK'd me with a sniper rifle. That noob who hit that APC at 300m with light AT! Our APC...

08-09-2008, 01:57 AM	#6 (permalink)
DrakenViator Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Grand Rapids, MI Posts: 814	Re: Tales of Computer Idiocy I work as a sales associate for an office supply store. Well one time I had a customer call in on the phone looking for an ink cartridge for her Windows 98 computer, no joke. I believe her exact words were, "I have Windows 98, what black ink cartridge do I need?" Well I managed to talk the customer into opening her printer and pulling out the cartridge, then getting her to read off the model number. To which she first read off the manufacturing date stamped on the bottom. I then directed her to the sticker on the top of the cartridge which gave me the model number for the HP 56 black ink that she needed... That was a fun one... Oh and I HATE having to tell customers that Windows does not equal Office. I actually had a customer call to find out prices to upgrade her version of Windows because she needed Excel and her current copy of Windows didn't include it. It took me almost TEN minutes to explain it to her because,'her other Windows included Excel.' Oh I could go on for DAYS! ~ Draken __________________ \|TG-55\| Infantry Division "When asked how I knew some small unit tactics... I simply stated "Video Games". They thought I was joking..." ~ Dirtboy

08-09-2008, 03:59 PM	#7 (permalink)
Sir-Nerd Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: In the middle of North Ohio Posts: 1,111	Re: Tales of Computer Idiocy I hate when people think brands are the most inportant thing in the world. I had a friend come over and look at the house. He saw my sisters and mom's Dells next to my gaming machine and started boasting about his computer being a way better than mine. I've always took the front plate off my case to allow better air circulation, and in the process, disguising it as a POS computer. Whenever i ask my friends what type of computer it is i always get "It's a Dell" or "It a windows XP.\ My biggest peeve is that my sister and mother are completely ignorant about technology and they ignore me and dad's solutions to there computer problems. My sister thinks that if i install a 1 gigabyte game on her computer for a LAN party on her 500 gig harddrive, it'll slow her computer down. __________________ NOW POWERED BY WINDOWS VISTA 64BIT!!! When you can't run anymore, you crawl and when you can't do that, you find someone to carry you.

08-09-2008, 04:12 PM	#8 (permalink)
MrMojay Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Ireland Posts: 150	Re: Tales of Computer Idiocy Facilities in my job were called by an office person saying her "cup holder" was broken, so out of curiosity they went up to her desk and could not see the cup holder so they wondered where it was, the lady said "look it wont work" and pressed the eject button on the cd-rom drive, it was probably welded to the insides covered in tea and coffee and god knows what else. __________________ Ratatat...PewPew

08-09-2008, 07:41 PM	#9 (permalink)
FatCobra Join Date: Jan 2006 Posts: 249	Re: Tales of Computer Idiocy Since you guys are PC Nerds, can you help me out? I can't find the "Any" key on my keyboard.

08-09-2008, 08:03 PM	#11 (permalink)
Trooper Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: In my wifes house......if she says i can Age: 25 Posts: 8,894	Re: Tales of Computer Idiocy Working in college as a PC/av tech i would every single Monday Wednesday and Friday be called down to the lecture hall at 7:30am. Same Prof same problem. And when i say prof he was like campus god so no one ever told him how to stop causing this problem. He would put his floppy disk in the PC then start it up......see the problem. And every day after his classes my supervisor would get a phone call about how rude and slow i was getting the problem fixed and if i would just fix the PC he wouldnt have to keep calling me down every single class period. He even went so far to make a big sence in class with me there, so i decided to give everyone a lesson on how to fix his problem. DO NOT PUT THE DISK IN BEFORE YOU START THE PC..and if he does you just eject it and press the space bar. i got a stern talking to by my supervisor my supervisors boss and sir campus god about how rude i was....after words my super said i wasnt wrong and should have done that weeks ago.

08-09-2008, 09:47 PM	#12 (permalink)
Quest Shady Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Brandon, FL Age: 37 Posts: 808	Re: Tales of Computer Idiocy OK... Working as AOL Tech Support I take a call... "Thank You for calling AOL Technical Support for Windows...How can I Help you today." My normal opening that I repeat over and over....and on this evening I get a gentleman telling me that he is having problems connecting to AOL. Which of course I am "SUPPOSED" to follow the Sherlock program that is supposed to walk me through each step and question all while trying to keep a low talk time... OK Sir lets take a look at your setup. Is your computer on and running right now... YES? Good...and have you checked all the lines from the wall to the back of the modem and ensured that they are plugged into the right connections? OK Sir then lets check your setup...Please hit Start...Run.... What do you mean you can't right now.... He proceeded to inform me that he had walked 2 blocks to a pay phone to call me. When I asked why he did that he told me because if he called from the home phone then he wouldn't be able to try and sign on. He just wanted some ideas for me to give him to try so he could try and remember them and try them when he got back. Um sir you could have called me from your house phone and I could have walked you through the steps...Then you could have tried signing on... HE then explains to me...But then I couldn't sign on because I was on the phone and thats why I walked to this phone. And you wonder why I had some headaches at the end of th e night.... I was so glad for the mute button at times because I was laughing so hard!!! __________________ TG CS:S SOPs \|TG CS:S Admins \| SUPPORTING MEMBERSHIPS Health and Wellness are not accidents. Take Action Now!

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