I figured it was a good time to sit down and reflect on the past.

Tactical Gamer as a whole meant a lot to me as a young adult that considered themselves a avid gamer. While I didnt branch out to many games, I preferred to focus on 1 or 2 and give them my all. BF2142 was my entry and shining star. It became my full time hobby, not because of the game, but because of our TG ideal and the brotherhood we formed. I didn't make a game better, safer, or moderated. I made friends that that was the most important aspect.

Granted, I love my job as an admin. Even though I complained out my ass, it was my desire to make the servers the best I could for my fellow friends and like-minded peers.

In time I slipped into the ranks of TGU and started to help with some basics. Passing on education was and still is a part of my life. I became Dean, one of my most proud duties to TG. My team helped TGU out of some dark times, overhauled some framework that is still used today from what I see. It still gives me a smile to see its still there and helping others.

There was a point in BF2142 that I just couldn't take the game any longer. I think many of you can still remember the rampant crashes that plagued our servers and many others. I gave up on EA, I know after I left in the year or 2 to come, much of it also died out.

Then life suddenly happened, I lost my job for a cause in my heart that I couldn't turn away anymore. I was actually quite embarrassed to tell anyone on TG of my life choices, fearing backlash or loss of dear friends. TG have many people, some liberal, some conservative. The sandbox's few threads about gay's gave me even more fear. I decided enough was enough and I came out to my former 3rd mates, my closest core. I was transgender.

By that time I was already living as a legal female full time, on treatments and damn happy. But I sorely missed my TG and the people there. I kept popping in, joining up briefly with the 999th and then 56th. But it didn't last. I didn't have a game to connect to.

Still to this day it saddens me that I'm not as close to TG as I once was, but I hope to change things around. I'm a girl, that sounds like a guy on TS. 'F' it, I'm not going to be scared anymore. I'm a damn good gamer that knows how to follow and lead. If ya don't want it, find another squad! I <3 my TG to much!

Hopefully Planenside 2 will get me back in touch with my fellow peers and make new ones.

btw, if you have any questions about what I am. Please PM me, I love to educate people!