Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Silly Military "tasks"

Collapse
X
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Silly Military "tasks"

    I know that there are several of you in the military or was at one time, so you know all the silly crap they make you do that make no-sense or try to impress a General that is visiting. I just wanted to know if I am the only one having to do these demeaning task?

    Here are a few of my jobs that really made me reconsider enlisting:

    1. Cleaned bird dookie off of stop signs.
    2. Mowed 3 acres of grass with a push mower(Did that yesterday)
    3. Nailed a branch onto a dead tree.(yes...a dead bare tree)
    4. Weedwacked an entire parade field.(not the corners...the FIELD)
    5. Put fresh snow down in the C.O's front yard because his wife didnt like "dirty"snow.

    Anybody else that was in the Military have a similiar story they want to share?
    "Dirtboy is super awesome, and chicks dig him too!"- Everyone




  • #2
    Re: Silly Military "tasks"

    I had to hit my Master Sergeant's shins with a duct tape wrapped baseball bat for an hour every day for a week. He was training for a kickboxing tournament in Thailand.

    There's a phrase that we have in the Marines, called "painting the rocks". Often times there's a rock garden outside COs' headquarters (rocks are effective in every clime and place) with, say, all the rocks white, except the red ones that spell out the unit name. Often, when a new CO comes on, he'll decide that instead of red letters in a field of white, that he wants yellow letters in a field of red, or white letters, outlined in red, in a field of yellow, or something else. The point is that COs change the color of these rocks simply because they can, and some poor private is stuck doing it. So now, whenever a new CO makes changes soon after coming on board, that seem to be without thought, it's called "painting the rocks": he's doing it just because he can... Anyway, I said all that, to say this: I've literally painted the rocks.
    Become a supporting member!
    Buy a Tactical Duck!
    Take the world's smallest political quiz! "I was touched by His Noodly Appendage."
    TacticalGamer TX LAN/BBQ Veteran:

    Comment


    • #3
      Re: Silly Military "tasks"

      I cut across the grass outside of the building instead of using the side walk, it was a 10 x10 size piece and somebody saw me. I ended up standing guard in full kit marching around it for the next week.

      Another was I messed up and my punishment was cutting grass with a knife from my mess kit for 3 days.

      I cannot count the meaningless time spent using a buffer and wax to polish a floor that did not need it. I never figured out why they could simply not use Mop & Glo.

      Picking up pine cones from the side of the road is a favorite of mine.

      Guarding things like a motor pool in the states. Never made any sense watching locked up vehicles in a compound, on a base.

      Fireguard. All the buildings I ever did it in had fire alarms and sprinkler systems installed.

      The best though, was someone got caught with their room a bit messy. He ended sleeping outside the building with everything he owned for 2 weeks in pup tent. But that was funny!!

      Reflecting upon it, there were tons of things that were a complete waste of time and pissed me off. Thankfully most of that stuff is behind me now!!
      "The chief foundations of all states, new as well as old or composite, are good laws and good arms; and as there cannot be good laws where the state is not well armed, it follows that where they are well armed they have good laws." -Machiavelli

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: Silly Military "tasks"

        the road to the trash dump was 2 miles long. I had to pick up every piece of trash, ciggarette buts included - with no bag to put it in. then I had to trim back all vegitation with left handed scissors, grass included.

        wait, that was what the police made me do when i threw a rock through the police station window as a teenager...

        Up, sluggard, and waste not life; in the grave will be sleeping enough! Benjamin Franklin

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: Silly Military "tasks"

          Someone stole my socks from my foot locker. I dont know how but I had a combo lock on it it, I was paraniod about it. Needless to say The Drill Sgt didn't like it and I took the fall and didn't let him know someone took it. I didn't want the whole group to pay. I spent a full day in 110 degree weather washing someone's car with a new tooth brush. I had 2 luckly! I had to clean everything. The wheels, Wheel wells, undercarrage, and as much of the engine I could. Took me well over 14 hours. The Drill Sgt was very impressed. but I did lose out on a full day of gernade tossing. So I had to do everything the next day at double speed to catch up.

          He never told me who's car it was...

          Oh you might find that harsh, but I did mess up the day before. But I rather not go into that one.
          The soldier formerly known as, Eroak.

          From the TG Primer: 2) Create an environment where there is
          mutual respect for your fellow gamers
          and where all members
          would be working together to advance the enjoyment of their hobby.
          Former TGU Dean, 3rd, 9th, & 56th IHS member.

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: Silly Military "tasks"

            Actually, in my 6 years in the Navy I never had to do any "useless" work.

            On the mop and glow. I think it is because mop and glow doesn't last as long. We actually got approval to use it instead of the wax and it turned out bad. Well, it did go down faster and the shine was great, but we had to do it two, sometimes three times a week. The wax we usually only had to do once a week. It also was much more difficult to strip clean so you could start over again.

            One guy had a "hardening agent" he added to the wax. At least that is what he called it. It increased the shine and gave us up to two weeks of nice, shiny floors. Had to be real careful with the application though.
            Im not racists, I have republican friends. Radio show host.
            - "The essence of tyranny is the denial of complexity". -Jacob Burkhardt
            - "A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds" - Emerson
            - "People should not be afraid of it's government, government should be afraid of it's People." - Line from V for Vendetta
            - If software were as unreliable as economic theory, there wouldn't be a plane made of anything other than paper that could get off the ground. Jim Fawcette
            - "Let me now state what seems to me the decisive objection to any conservatism which deserves to be called such. It is that by its very nature it cannot offer an alternative to the direction in which we are moving." -Friedrich Hayek
            - "Don't waist your time on me your already the voice inside my head." Blink 182 to my wife

            Comment


            • #7
              Re: Silly Military "tasks"

              Originally posted by Dirtboy View Post
              3. Nailed a branch onto a dead tree.(yes...a dead bare tree)
              Man, that's hilarious!

              Originally posted by Gringo
              Actually, in my 6 years in the Navy I never had to do any "useless" work.
              Gringo, you must have been an "O"?

              Me and a crew of other TADers spent a week painting the inside of an unused building that remained abandonded the entire four years I was on the base. Of course there were the countless hours of cleaning and scrubbing for VIP visits that amounted to said VIP walking past the front door of the building. My favorite was the 6 hour security patrols around the base in the middle of the night in a ford ranger pickup...unarmed.
              New to TG?

              Comment


              • #8
                Re: Silly Military "tasks"

                The most irrelevant task I've seen in my military experience was my last 2 months of active duty... I was recently transfered to guard section of 1st Marines, in Camp Pendleton, along with the other 40 or so soon-to-be-civilians, who didn't care about about anything military anymore, to guard the Radio compound, the Motor transport compound, and the Armory (Armory being understandable). The task was simple, but very silly and pointless in my mind. Every night the OOD would sit around and think of things that could go wrong while he was on duty. He would pick one and call the guard shack and describe the scenario. Then the SGT of the guard had to "act out" the scenario and have the OOD supervise and grade the guard sections actions. This usually consisted of a scenario of someone trying to break into the BAS, which meant that 6 poor Marines, who were trying to get some sleep between their 6-on-6-off rotation of post, had to jump out of bed put their flak and Kevlar on, grab a loaner weapon from the COG, and jump in the duty vehicle to drive maybe a quarter mile and quarden off the building for about 30 seconds. At this point the OOD would walk up, call "end-ex" and "debrief" us of what we just did.... Does this make any sense to anyone?

                Comment


                • #9
                  Re: Silly Military "tasks"

                  Originally posted by USN_Squid View Post
                  Gringo, you must have been an "O"?
                  Nope, just got lucky I guess. Even during boot camp. I was quarantined for two of the worst days because somebody from my hometown had hepatitis. Plus I could always smell a bad job. Often the jobs that sound good are the ones you avoid.

                  Originally posted by USN_Squid View Post
                  My favorite was the 6 hour security patrols around the base in the middle of the night in a ford ranger pickup...unarmed.
                  Thats another one I got lucky with. I only had to do one of them. My name was right in the middle and we had a change of officers about every three weeks. Somehow the schedule always worked such that I got the one right after class or right before class. The good thing about that? That is when all those pesky personnel inspections took place!
                  Im not racists, I have republican friends. Radio show host.
                  - "The essence of tyranny is the denial of complexity". -Jacob Burkhardt
                  - "A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds" - Emerson
                  - "People should not be afraid of it's government, government should be afraid of it's People." - Line from V for Vendetta
                  - If software were as unreliable as economic theory, there wouldn't be a plane made of anything other than paper that could get off the ground. Jim Fawcette
                  - "Let me now state what seems to me the decisive objection to any conservatism which deserves to be called such. It is that by its very nature it cannot offer an alternative to the direction in which we are moving." -Friedrich Hayek
                  - "Don't waist your time on me your already the voice inside my head." Blink 182 to my wife

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Re: Silly Military "tasks"

                    Warning: Not military. Not even mine. But still fitting, I hope.

                    I went to a Jesuit high school. My time was gentle, all things considered. At alumni events, I hear many of the draconian sentenced for 'JUG': Judgment Under God (the Jesuit version of detention in the time before the mid 80s or so).

                    My favorite story that I've heard to date: On a fall afternoon, sending senior offenders to the tree-canopied gardens behind the rectory/administration building with a Sharpie marker and having them number all the leaves on the ground.
                    [volun2]
                    NS Game Officer. TF2 Admin. BF2 Admin / Scripter. PM with issues.
                    Tempus: Pokerface is nailing it right on the head. Everyone who is arguing against him is simply arguing against reality.
                    <anmuzi> it is not permitted to have privacy or anonymity
                    <LazyEye> yeah when I play on TG the server digs though my trash

                    Arm yourself with knowledge: TG NS TF2 BF2

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Re: Silly Military &quot;tasks&quot;

                      While in Iraq some big wig was going to be visiting our base, so we cleaned out the entire motor pool, then regraded it with fresh gravel. Whoever it was probably never even came within half a mile of our area.

                      On the plus side, we just hired locals and TCN's to do it, but the task was still pointless.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Re: Silly Military &quot;tasks&quot;

                        How many shellbacks do we have here? Try explaining that to these civvies!
                        Become a supporting member!
                        Buy a Tactical Duck!
                        Take the world's smallest political quiz! "I was touched by His Noodly Appendage."
                        TacticalGamer TX LAN/BBQ Veteran:

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Re: Silly Military &quot;tasks&quot;

                          Originally posted by CingularDuality View Post
                          How many shellbacks do we have here? Try explaining that to these civvies!
                          Hello fellow trusty shellback :)

                          I work with a lot of ex navy guys (nuke business). My last manager never crossed the line so I would call him a wog and tease him about it. He would get visibly bothered by it so I reserved my taunts for after work at the bar.


                          stupid things I did in the Navy

                          1. paint over rust for inspections.
                          2. endlessly field day (clean) instead of train for inspections
                          3. bust up a concrete side walk using hand tools when the Sea Bees had heavy equipment
                          4. wax a floor with neutral kiwi shoe polish (boot camp)
                          5. Buffer of course.... but my spin... I thought I would be clever and strip a floor with wax, mop the excess and buff it out. Skipping the stripper step. The problem was I used PineSol by mistake. It took like 5 coats of wax to get a shine back.
                          ...............................








                          Those who would give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.

                          -Benjamin Franklin

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Re: Silly Military &quot;tasks&quot;

                            Originally posted by CingularDuality View Post
                            I had to hit my Master Sergeant's shins with a duct tape wrapped baseball bat for an hour every day for a week. He was training for a kickboxing tournament in Thailand.
                            Try and tell me with a straight face you didn't enjoy that on some level.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Re: Silly Military &quot;tasks&quot;

                              anybody else ever have to flip the rocks in basic training so that they could tan evenly? man that sucked.....if the Drill Sergeant thought I lost track of which rocks I flipped he would make me start over. And apologize to the rocks that I had not flipped.
                              |TG-Irr|Avengingllama
                              I used to eat paint chips. Now I just drink the paint because I couldn't find a salsa that went well with the chips and they were dry =)

                              Comment

                              Connect

                              Collapse

                              TeamSpeak 3 Server

                              Collapse

                              Advertisement

                              Collapse

                              Twitter Feed

                              Collapse

                              Working...
                              X