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Ask the Oracle....lol

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  • Ask the Oracle....lol

    I sortof took this from the 2142 forum but it gave me an idea. http://askoracle.net/index.php That is an intriguing website. The answers may most of the time be full of crap, but they're fun to read. Check it out!

    Q. Is my life worth living?

    A. After the most thorough investigation I can answer with confidence: no.

    It was a default question that popped up...

    Q. Do you suck?

    A. I believe I do.

  • #2
    Re: Ask the Oracle....lol

    lol I thought you stole this from Lyra. xP
    |TG| HolyEnd

    Comment


    • #3
      Re: Ask the Oracle....lol

      Had some fun with this today, thanks. :)
      |TG-Irr| JWG

      Battlefield 2 - Project Reality

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: Ask the Oracle....lol

        Will you have mad passionate sex with me?
        --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
        The Oracle replied:
        Yes, unless you screw things up.


        mmmm I probably screwed it up when I got married.
        "Sympathy means a lot, coming from Kulmar. I didn't think it was possible.
        Good luck getting rid of your disease. If you're infected, though, stay away--I can't afford to be a zombie right now.
        " Ednos


        sigpic




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        • #5
          Re: Ask the Oracle....lol

          -How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?
          -Tons! I can imagine the shock.

          -Will woot.com offer something good in seven minutes?
          -Not in my lifetime. And I am going to live long.

          -Did you ever see a llama kiss a llama on the llama llama llama’s tastes of llama llama llama duck?
          -I like you, too!


          Comment


          • #6
            Re: Ask the Oracle....lol

            You asked:
            Who was the first human on the moon

            The Oracle replied:
            George W. Bush

            You asked:
            Who’s George Bush?

            The Oracle replied:
            I’d rather not talk about him.

            You asked:
            Why not?

            The Oracle replied:
            I’m sure Kim Jong Il is behind this.

            You asked:
            How’d you know?

            The Oracle replied:
            I’m the Oracle. Of course I know.

            You asked:

            What is the capital of washington
            The Oracle replied:

            Sex.
            lol
            Last edited by Bandaid; 05-31-2009, 03:26 PM.
            sigpic
            I'm Back.

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            • #7
              Re: Ask the Oracle....lol

              Lol...

              You asked:

              Why are you staring at me?
              The Oracle replied:

              The root cause of this unfortunate series of events is the government. It limits our freedom.
              You asked:

              Who created you?
              The Oracle replied:

              Aapo Puskala
              You asked:

              Who am I?
              The Oracle replied:

              You are what you believe you are.
              You asked:

              Is my life worth living?
              The Oracle replied:

              If you ask me - as many people do - I say no. I just got a phone call where I learned this.
              |TG-18th| Acreo Aeneas
              TG World of Tanks Clan Executive Officer
              Former 9th & 13th

              Pronounciation: Eh-Cree-Oh Ah-Nay-Ess
              Still can't say it? Call me Acorn then. -.-





              SSDs I Own: Kingston HyperX 3K (240 GB), Samsung 840 Pro (256 GB), Samsung 840 EVO (250 GB), Samsung 840 x 2 (120 GB), Plextor M5S (120 GB), OCZ Vertex (30 GB)

              TG Primer and Rules

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              • #8
                Re: Ask the Oracle....lol

                Lol this is epic. The fortune rubber has truely moved into the digital age!

                You asked:
                So you are the Oracle huh?

                The Oracle replied:
                Yes.

                -----------------------------------
                You asked:
                Interesting

                The Oracle replied:
                That doesn’t look like a question to me. Please use complete sentences.

                ----------------------------------
                Ok then, Is Tactical Gamer the best website on the web?

                The Oracle replied:
                www.askoracle.net is the best site ever. Count me on this one at least.
                -----------------------------------
                You asked:
                Is fighter a friend of the oracle for bringing you to the attention of TG?

                The Oracle replied:
                Certainly!
                ------------------------------------
                Then I tryed to get it angry...lol

                You asked:
                You think you’re so great!

                The Oracle replied:
                Thanks, you made me feel good.
                Then I asked it the ULTIMATE question.

                You asked:
                What came first the chicken or the egg?

                The Oracle replied:
                The first one yields a better result.
                Dang it, it knows everything! :icon_eek:

                Comment


                • #9
                  Re: Ask the Oracle....lol

                  Where are my pants
                  The Oracle replied:

                  Under a train.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Re: Ask the Oracle....lol

                    That was great. I asked a zillion things and laughed heartily. My fave...
                    You asked:
                    Who wrote Jane Eyre?
                    The Oracle replied:
                    Ty Pennington. Revealing this information to others might jeopardize national security. Keep it to yourself.

                    sigpic
                    "The true genius shudders at incompleteness - and usually prefers silence to saying
                    something which is not everything it should be." — Edgar Allan Poe

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Re: Ask the Oracle....lol

                      You asked:

                      Does she love me?
                      The Oracle replied:

                      I’m afraid I must disappoint you, but no he doesn’t.

                      He? Phew, close one there!

                      You asked:

                      Why does my foot itch?
                      The Oracle replied:

                      This was decided a long time ago, before you or I were even born.
                      I knew it!

                      You asked:

                      How did you become so sexy?
                      The Oracle replied:

                      With limitless cash. Of all the questions in the world you could have asked me, you chose this.
                      You asked:

                      Will I get Zhohar’s dogtags in Battlefield 2142 before I die?
                      The Oracle replied:

                      No you won’t.
                      Well crap!

                      You asked:

                      You’re hot.
                      The Oracle replied:

                      I thought we are here to discuss you, not me.
                      You asked:

                      Can I have your phone number?
                      The Oracle replied:

                      Sorry, I can only contact you over the Web.
                      :(

                      You asked:

                      Will I cause nuclear winter?
                      The Oracle replied:

                      I have faith in you.
                      You asked:

                      What is the greatest sandwich?
                      The Oracle replied:

                      Noodles with Chicken and Vegetables
                      Orly?

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Re: Ask the Oracle....lol

                        Q: Who is your daddy, and what does he do?
                        A: The mean kid who used to tease others in kindergarten, remember?

                        Q: Im a cop, you idiot!
                        A: *Smiles and nods*

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Re: Ask the Oracle....lol

                          Anyone match this description???

                          You asked:
                          Who will win the TacticalGamer.com Insergency World Series?

                          The Oracle replied:
                          One who has the body and the calmness of Buddha.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Re: Ask the Oracle....lol

                            Originally posted by Bladecutter View Post
                            Quote:
                            You asked:
                            Does she love me?
                            The Oracle replied:
                            I’m afraid I must disappoint you, but no he doesn’t.

                            He? Phew, close one there!
                            Lemme guess. MarthaHyer??? oohhh... :D

                            sigpic
                            "The true genius shudders at incompleteness - and usually prefers silence to saying
                            something which is not everything it should be." — Edgar Allan Poe

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Re: Ask the Oracle....lol

                              You asked:

                              Are you thinking what I’m thinking, Pinky?
                              The Oracle replied:

                              No, how could you even think of such a thing? I can imagine the shock.

                              You asked:

                              Why yes, Brain, but where would we get that much tapioca pudding?
                              The Oracle replied:

                              Religious fanticism is behind this tragedy.

                              Comment

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