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Detecting and controlling Control Freaks

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  • Detecting and controlling Control Freaks

    It seems I have a temperament that is highly explosive when in contact with the Control Freak temperament. Most everyone has a hard time with them, but when I'm with them, objects fly, budgets plummet, and political relationships crumble to dust. Worse yet, I've found myself several times getting suckered into some kind of professional relationship with them.

    In case you don't quite know what a Control Freak is: We all know Wyzcrak as a highly authoritative and choleric type, however he is definately not a Control Freak. What sets him apart from a genuine Control Freak is, when confronted by new facts from others, Wyzcrak's behaviour changes. When a Control Freak is confronted with new facts, the deliverer of those facts become changed by the Control Freak. Imagine an NS comm booting everyone who tells him the location of a new Onos, citing the player is demoralizing the team. A comical example, but the real life versions are much more subtle, just as absurd, and, for me at least, as scary as all Hell.

    So if you have had to deal with someone who is highly picky, has pressured you into crossing lines you have never thought you'd ever cross and have regretted it, indecisive and hem-haw-ish when it's not their idea and a wreckless monster when it is, wins any argument at the cost of all true solutions, and whose eyes just glaze over in disgust at any hard fact they don't like or any level of detail as intricate as a light switch, let me know how you have acted and see others act with them.

    I'd like your personal experience with
    a) sniffing these people out when you first meet them,
    b) dealing with them when you're somehow forced to.

    --ShroomPicker
    Last edited by shroompicker; 04-25-2005, 09:20 PM.
    -- Shroom
    I tried smoking mushrooms once. Couldn't keep the pizza lit.

  • #2
    Re: Detecting and controlling Control Freaks

    Control freaks need to believe that they're winning. If your relationship with such a freak is professional in nature, it may mean sucking up some pride as you work your suggestions into the mix, letting the freak believe that they are his own, letting him take the credit, whatnot; the end product shouldn't suffer if it can be avoided.

    More thoughts to come.
    [volun2]
    NS Game Officer. TF2 Admin. BF2 Admin / Scripter. PM with issues.
    Tempus: Pokerface is nailing it right on the head. Everyone who is arguing against him is simply arguing against reality.
    <anmuzi> it is not permitted to have privacy or anonymity
    <LazyEye> yeah when I play on TG the server digs though my trash

    Arm yourself with knowledge: TG NS TF2 BF2

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    • #3
      Re: Detecting and controlling Control Freaks

      Wow, fast reply, and an interesting one, as it points out exactly why I'm a catalyst for explostions with them. When I have suggestions, like ideas that I'm not sure are true but might be, they're suggestions, I don't hold on to them that tightly. When they're truths, they're truths. They exist on a higher plane than any one person, their pride, anything, they're just true. "2+2 isn't 5". "That just proves your negative attitude." Whooo!!

      When they're in the position of authority, I've repeatedly found myself doing _exactly_ what they want, since I've already been repremanded for not doing so, then getting repremanded for _that_, hard. Then I do the next task exactly the way they want, this time on completion, I repeat all the bullet points: you wanted boom, boom, boom, right? Right. Okay the result is exactly as you want, boom, and I get the speech down to under two sentances so that everything can fit inside the freak's small working memory. This makes it highly obvious to the freak and everyone in the room (not that they didn't know already) that it's all crap, and of course I'm the one that gets sent to Departmental Emergency Evaluation Program, Special High Intensity Training.

      --Shroom
      -- Shroom
      I tried smoking mushrooms once. Couldn't keep the pizza lit.

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      • #4
        Re: Detecting and controlling Control Freaks

        I think control-freaks act a certain way (as we all do) to make themselves feel better. Control gives comfort, controlling everything will somehow make them happier and more successful...

        In my experience it actually slows them down... I have folks that work for me that will have a 3 hour meeting to plan what they will say for the following 1 hour meeting... then go back and post game it to death.... In my biz they are losing money... and aren't happy...

        You can't change them, or avoid them entirely... to cope I've learned to accept them...sometimes with 3 advil and cold beer
        and I believe in kharma....
        What goes around comes around............

        and knowing that they're miserable helps... :icon16:

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        • #5
          Re: Detecting and controlling Control Freaks

          Originally posted by shroompicker
          "2+2 isn't 5"
          Sorry, but whatever Thom Yorke says, goes.

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          • #6
            Re: Detecting and controlling Control Freaks

            Funny, my boss is a control freak. Needs to be in the middle of everythibng, obsesses about the most minor of details, and generally, behaves like a 4 year old when he doesn't get his way.

            Control freaks not only need control to boost their self esteem, which is probably in the DSM-IV somewhere, but they are at base paranoid. Letting go of control means that *gasp* someone somewhere is making a decision somewhere without their vital input, maybe even AGAINST them.

            Adjust your behavior accordingly, that is a scared child, or a mental patient off their meds. Saturate them with information, then explain why it can't rationally be that way, given current time/manpower/budget/law of physics contraints.

            You end up managing them more than they manage you, but at least you can keep them from screwing things up too much.

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