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AoC laws in this country.

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  • AoC laws in this country.

    A friend is going through something right now (he met a girl who is kind of under age... and he's a few years younger than myself.). So this of course brings up the subject of the age of consent laws in my state. I believe my state is 16. He's 20, the girl just turned 15.

    My friends and I got in to a discussion about it. My feelings on this are. If the parents say its ok, then it should be ok. After all, they are the parents, right? They're not going to do anything to endanger their daughter or put her in any harm. So if they give their ok to the relationship, then thats it. However, our beautiful and wonderful government feels differently. Even if the parents consent to this relationship, my friend can still go to jail. I don't feel this is fair, because, as I said earlier.. they are the parents, shouldn't they have a say in what should happen? If they don't press charges, then should it be up to the government to do it for them?

    I know this is a rather sensitive subject. Cause I know a lot of you guys are fathers so I don't want to start a huge flame war or anything. I'm just trying to start a discussion of opinions on how completely retarded these laws are now and how its not up to the government to do jack if the parents consent to the relationship.

    Anyway, please feel free to give your opinions. Its why I posted this :P

  • #2
    Re: AoC laws in this country.

    IMHO... she's a little too young. I obviously am not witnessing the situation, and I don't know the people. Hell, some twenty year olds I know are too "young" to be in a relationship, while there are pre teens who should be allowed to make their own choices. Its all a level of maturity.

    Anyway, I'm a firm believer in the half+7 rule ;)


    • #3
      Re: AoC laws in this country.

      There plenty of laws that allow the government to over-ride parents in the interest of their children when there's abuse or drug addiction. I think we can agree those are good laws. The parent's aren't the final authority.

      As for my opinion, she's too young. If your friend pursues this he could end up convicted and I wouldn't be eager to defend him.


      • #4
        Re: AoC laws in this country.

        If it's something they're serious about, they can make do with a platonic relationship untill she is old enough.

        - -


        • #5
          Re: AoC laws in this country.

          Dan Savage has a saying regarding relationships with younger people: treat them like campsites, and leave them better than you found them.

          There isn't a number you can put on something like this, but there's DEFINITELY a standard of conduct to which people should adhere (and said standard precludes relationships with people of a markedly low age).

          Me? I'd take notes for the future, but I'd walk on by.
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          • #6
            Re: AoC laws in this country.

            I once worked with a guy that was very much into younger girls. Like, he was 26 and checking out 14 year olds. I confronted him about it one day and he said "There is no age limit on love!". To this I replied, "True in theory, but the state says otherwise."

            Frankly, I think that there should be no limit on age difference in a relationship, with one stipulation: both people are at least 20 years old (yes, I know this is older than the law requirement for consent). This is the age where I think the majority of people level out in their maturity. As with all things, there will be exceptions; people more or less mature than they should be for their age. But this is where I think people start to understand the real concept of responsibility and relationships. If both people aren't 20, you should really stick to a 1-2 years difference, in my opinion.

            In the case of the guy mentioned in the first post, I'm sorry, but I consider that really wrong. I have to wonder why he's actually "dating" her to begin with. This is not the middle ages, where 50 year old kings marry 14 year old virgins for the sake of producing heirs. I see no reason whatsoever why a guy that's almost done with college needs to have a relationship with a highschool freshman. I'm not intending to make a flame here, but it indicates to me that this guy has some serious problems.

            All opinions aside, he needs to break that relationship off until she at least hits the age of consent. If the school administration gets wind of it, he's going to end up as a convicted sex offender, and his life is over at that point.

            edit: On a side note, here's the age of consent table:

            So if you're a lesbian looking to rob the cradle, you can go to Canada or Austria.
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            • #7
              Re: AoC laws in this country.

              Originally posted by SmokingTarpan
              All opinions aside, he needs to break that relationship off until she at least hits the age of consent. If the school administration gets wind of it, he's going to end up as a convicted sex offender, and his life is over at that point.
              I completely agree. If your friend won't listen to sense, the law, or friendly advice, put some distance between the two of you: In addition to making a decision not to engage in sexual relationships with minors, part of being an adult is taking responsibility for the characters with whom one chooses to associate. There are consequences to his behavior, but there are also consequences to yours.


              • #8
                Re: AoC laws in this country.

                You should also note that with the AoC laws, even if the AoC is set at 16, usually have a limit. In MN the AoC is 16, but only if the older person in the relationship is 3 years older or less. So, if she is 16 and he is 20, it's still illegal, and the parents are not the only ones that can press charges in such a case.
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