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  • Stupid People

    STUPID PEOPLE


    Stupid people should have to wear signs that just say, I'm Stupid". That way you wouldn't rely on them, would you? You wouldn't ask them anything. It would be like, "Excuse me... oops, never mind. I didn't see your sign."

    It's like before my wife and I moved. Our house was full of boxes and there was a U-Haul truck in our driveway. My neighbor comes over and says "Hey,
    you moving?" "Nope. We just pack our stuff up once or twice a week to see how many boxes it takes. Here's your sign."

    A couple of months ago I went fishing with a buddy of mine, we pulled his boat into the dock, I lifted up this big stringer of bass and this idiot on the dock goes, "Hey, y'all catch all them fish?" "Nope-Talked 'em into giving up. Here's your sign."

    I was watching one of those animal shows on the Discovery Channel. There was a guy inventing a shark bite suit. And there's only one way to test it.
    "Alright Jimmy, you got that shark suit on, it looks good...They want you to jump into this pool of sharks, and you tell us if it hurts when they bite you." "Well, all right, but hold my sign. I don't wanna lose it."

    Last time I had a flat tire, I pulled my truck into one of those side-of-the-road gas stations. The attendant walks out, looks at my truck, looks at me, and I SWEAR he said, "Tire go flat?" I couldn't resist. said, "Nope. I was driving around and those other three just swelled right up on me. Here's your sign."

    We were trying to sell our car about a year ago. A guy came over to the house and drove the car around for about 45 minutes. We get back to the house, he gets out of the car, reaches down and grabs the exhaust pipe, then says, "Darn that's hot!" See? If he'd been wearing his sign, I could have stopped him.

    I learned to drive an 18 wheeler in my days of adventure. Wouldn't you know I misjudged the height of a bridge. The truck got stuck and I couldn't get
    it out no matter how I tried. I radioed in for help and eventually a local cop shows up to take the report. He went through his basic questioning..ok.. no problem. I thought for sure he was clear of needing a sign......until he asked "So.. is your truck stuck?" I couldn't help myself! I looked at him, looked back at the rig and then back to him and said ........."no I'm delivering a bridge...here's your sign."

    I stayed late at work one night and a co-worker looked at me and said "Are you still here?" I replied, "No. I left about 10 minutes ago. Here's your sign."

    Anybody you know need a sign today?
    I do what I can.

    cpgf: (n.) Acronym describing a significant other who has not yet acheived full spousal status and is in possession of a cable modem; of note because at YOUR house, you still have dial-up -- and crappy dialup at that.


  • #2
    Re: Stupid People

    Jeff Foxworthy rules dude :P
    I have heard those millions of times, and it's still funny :D


    Comment


    • #3
      Re: Stupid People

      Originally posted by HSantal
      STUPID PEOPLE


      Stupid people should have to wear signs that just say, I'm Stupid". That way you wouldn't rely on them, would you? You wouldn't ask them anything. It would be like, "Excuse me... oops, never mind. I didn't see your sign."

      It's like before my wife and I moved. Our house was full of boxes and there was a U-Haul truck in our driveway. My neighbor comes over and says "Hey,
      you moving?" "Nope. We just pack our stuff up once or twice a week to see how many boxes it takes. Here's your sign."

      A couple of months ago I went fishing with a buddy of mine, we pulled his boat into the dock, I lifted up this big stringer of bass and this idiot on the dock goes, "Hey, y'all catch all them fish?" "Nope-Talked 'em into giving up. Here's your sign."

      I was watching one of those animal shows on the Discovery Channel. There was a guy inventing a shark bite suit. And there's only one way to test it.
      "Alright Jimmy, you got that shark suit on, it looks good...They want you to jump into this pool of sharks, and you tell us if it hurts when they bite you." "Well, all right, but hold my sign. I don't wanna lose it."

      Last time I had a flat tire, I pulled my truck into one of those side-of-the-road gas stations. The attendant walks out, looks at my truck, looks at me, and I SWEAR he said, "Tire go flat?" I couldn't resist. said, "Nope. I was driving around and those other three just swelled right up on me. Here's your sign."

      We were trying to sell our car about a year ago. A guy came over to the house and drove the car around for about 45 minutes. We get back to the house, he gets out of the car, reaches down and grabs the exhaust pipe, then says, "Darn that's hot!" See? If he'd been wearing his sign, I could have stopped him.

      I learned to drive an 18 wheeler in my days of adventure. Wouldn't you know I misjudged the height of a bridge. The truck got stuck and I couldn't get
      it out no matter how I tried. I radioed in for help and eventually a local cop shows up to take the report. He went through his basic questioning..ok.. no problem. I thought for sure he was clear of needing a sign......until he asked "So.. is your truck stuck?" I couldn't help myself! I looked at him, looked back at the rig and then back to him and said ........."no I'm delivering a bridge...here's your sign."

      I stayed late at work one night and a co-worker looked at me and said "Are you still here?" I replied, "No. I left about 10 minutes ago. Here's your sign."

      Anybody you know need a sign today?


      well actually getting an 18 wheeler stuck is pretty much in need of a sighn... heres yours...


      www.TeamElement.com

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: Stupid People

        how bout kicking admins off their own server? Yep, time for a sign. :icon15:
        --
        CaveDog
        "Go sell crazy somewhere else... we're all stocked up here."

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: Stupid People

          Originally posted by CaveDog
          how bout kicking admins off their own server? Yep, time for a sign. :icon15:

          who did that


          www.TeamElement.com

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: Stupid People

            Originally posted by CaveDog
            how bout kicking admins off their own server? Yep, time for a sign. :icon15:
            That happened to me about a month ago.


            I was the kickee.




            I do what I can.

            cpgf: (n.) Acronym describing a significant other who has not yet acheived full spousal status and is in possession of a cable modem; of note because at YOUR house, you still have dial-up -- and crappy dialup at that.

            Comment


            • #7
              Re: Stupid People

              that wasn't jeff foxworthy.

              it was Bill Engvall.

              so I guess here is yours.....j/k
              Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former. -Albert Einstein
              The two most common elements in the universe are Hydrogen and stupidity. -Harlan Ellison

              If all else fails: "rm -rf /"

              Comment


              • #8
                Re: Stupid People

                Originally posted by =DdogG=
                that wasn't jeff foxworthy.

                it was Bill Engvall.

                so I guess here is yours.....j/k
                You beat me to it. Jeff Foxworthy is noted for his "You might be a redneck" and they are both currently on tour together.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Re: Stupid People

                  Ah well. I don't care... I just got the listened to it and assumed it was jeff foxworthy :P

                  Bill and Jeff rule too.. and dont forget Larry the cable guy :P


                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Re: Stupid People

                    A few years back I was out on a walk studying the local vegetation. I crouched down to look at a plant, opened my book and identified the plant (it was a dwarf mallow). The farmer came up to me and said.

                    "What are you doing?"

                    I looked at him for a minute - unable to find any words. I was dumbfounded.

                    I told him I was was looking at the mallow and making sure I had a proper identification of it.

                    "Oh that's alright then," he said. "As long as your not a vandel."

                    No i'm not, but I will be later when I come back and burn down your house. Jeez, what a stupid question!
                    Jex.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Re: Stupid People

                      See, the whole problem with the world today is stupid people. I vote that we remove all the warning labels from everything and just let the problem solve itself.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Re: Stupid People

                        Do you know how many people out there don't know how to wire a plug? hahaha..
                        Jex.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Re: Stupid People

                          Originally posted by tycho
                          See, the whole problem with the world today is stupid people. I vote that we remove all the warning labels from everything and just let the problem solve itself.
                          I remember reading a comic book when I was a kid (must've been a few months back...) that described a vigilante character named "FoolKiller". He wasn't a hero, but he wasn't quite a villain, either. His mission was to go around killing stupid people that were hurting others. He was trying to clean up the gene pool, if you will...

                          I was always intrigued by this concept. Obviously it's wrong, but I'm not sure I'd be entirely disappointed to see someone like this come along in real life...
                          Become a supporting member!
                          Buy a Tactical Duck!
                          Take the world's smallest political quiz! "I was touched by His Noodly Appendage."
                          TacticalGamer TX LAN/BBQ Veteran:

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Re: Stupid People

                            That's almost like the Boondock Saints. They killed mobsters, pimp, drugdealers etc. We realy could use some of those about now.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Re: Stupid People

                              quick story


                              Went to walmart for an interview.. during the interview the guy asked me how I knew walmart was hiring. My answer was "well I walked into the store and saw the sign". The next question was "do you shop at walmart?". Me being me, I had to be a smartass and replied with "no, I was here to hold up the place and thought working here would be a much better option". He just looked at me for a couple of seconds (must of been thinking about my answer) and started to laugh.

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