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Sonny Bono 'assassinated' by hitmen

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  • Sonny Bono 'assassinated' by hitmen

    Shocking news!

    FTA:

    The former agent, who has been researching Bono's accident for the past decade(edit: WOW!), said top officials linked to an international drug and weapons ring feared the singer-turned-politician was about to expose their crimes - so they had him killed on the slopes.

    Bono, an experienced skiier, was ambushed on the slopes by hired hitmen, who beat him to death and then staged a tree collision, Mr Gunderson said.

    He called for authorities to dig up Bono's remains and open a homicide investigation.
    Important safety tip: Keep an eye peeled for tough characters disguised as trees.

  • #2
    Re: Sonny Bono 'assassinated' by hitmen

    I knew there was something fishy about all those trees at Breckenridge when I was there a couple weeks ago. Wheres my tinfoil hat? Someone get me my tinfoil hat!

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    • #3
      Re: Sonny Bono 'assassinated' by hitmen

      Is this the annoying rock star Bono or the annoying Palm Desert mayor Bono? Cause they both suck.
      A policy of freedom for the individual is the only truly progressive policy. -F.A. Hayek

      "$250,000 a year won't get me to Central Park West."

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      • #4
        Re: Sonny Bono 'assassinated' by hitmen

        It was that guy who slept with Cher AND who wasn't 20 years younger than Cher or Greg Allman. That about narrows it down, I think.

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        • #5
          Re: Sonny Bono 'assassinated' by hitmen

          That sucks.. Life comes at you fast.. Faster when your on skiis... Or rather Death I should say I guess,
          "A Veteran is someone who , at one point in their life, wrote a blank check made payable to
          'The United states of America' for an amount of 'upto and including my life'. That is honor, and there are way to many people in this country who no longer understand it."-Author Unknown

          "I got kicked out of barnes and noble once for moving all the bibles into the fiction section" -Any.

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          • #6
            Re: Sonny Bono 'assassinated' by hitmen

            Great. Now I'll have "I've got you babe" playing in my head for the rest of the day....
            Dude, seriously, WHAT handkerchief?

            snooggums' density principal: "The more dense a population, the more dense a population."

            Iliana: "You're a great friend but if we're ever chased by zombies I'm tripping you."

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            • #7
              Re: Sonny Bono 'assassinated' by hitmen

              Originally posted by Fenian420 View Post
              That sucks.. Life comes at you fast.. Faster when your on skiis... Or rather Death I should say I guess,
              If a gypsy told you that you'd die by slamming your face into a tree.... I mean, you'd have to figure that your odds of living to a ripe old age were pretty good, right? WRONG!

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              • #8
                Re: Sonny Bono 'assassinated' by hitmen

                Imagine dedicating your life's work to investigating this accident. Now THAT's hardcore...
                "I've been working since I was sixteen. I fought in two wars. Hell, I've killed people. I'm not saying that I didn't enjoy it..."
                -- Red Forman

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                • #9
                  Re: Sonny Bono 'assassinated' by hitmen

                  Here's hoping that U2's Bono suffers the same fate.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Re: Sonny Bono 'assassinated' by hitmen

                    Originally posted by Zoopy View Post
                    Here's hoping that U2's Bono suffers the same fate.
                    Why? Cause his music makes you jealous? ;)

                    ()

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                    • #11
                      Re: Sonny Bono 'assassinated' by hitmen

                      Originally posted by Chewy View Post
                      Why? Cause his music makes you want to put an ice pick into your brain.
                      And we havn't even touched his whole 'rock-star-humanitarian-yeah-im-awesome' vibe yet.

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                      • #12
                        Re: Sonny Bono 'assassinated' by hitmen

                        Originally posted by section-8 View Post
                        And we havn't even touched his whole 'rock-star-humanitarian-yeah-im-awesome' vibe yet.
                        I made a video response to this post but I can't seem to upload it. Anyway, here's the transcript:

                        Originally posted by leejo
                        LEAVE HIM ALONE. YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE! YOU DON'T KNOW!!!! He's a good man. A handsome man. He works so hard. LEAVE HIM ALONE!!!! LEAVE BONO ALONE!!!

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Re: Sonny Bono 'assassinated' by hitmen

                          Who was the other famous person who died by skiing into a tree about the same time. I remember there were two of them close together.
                          "Sympathy means a lot, coming from Kulmar. I didn't think it was possible.
                          Good luck getting rid of your disease. If you're infected, though, stay away--I can't afford to be a zombie right now.
                          " Ednos


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                          • #14
                            Re: Sonny Bono 'assassinated' by hitmen

                            Dat would be Mr. Michael Kennedy, one of Bobby Kennedy's kids.

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