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Economic Models explained with Cows -2008 update.

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  • Economic Models explained with Cows -2008 update.

    Some funny Economic stuff that My dad got in an email. Enjoy!

    SOCIALISM:
    You have 2 cows
    You give one to your neighour

    COMMUNISM:
    You have 2 cows
    The state takes both and gives you some milk

    FASCISM:
    You have 2 cows
    The state takes both and sells you some milk

    NAZISM:
    You have 2 cows
    The state takes both and shoots you

    BUREAUCRATISM
    You have 2 cows
    The state takes both, shoots one, milks the other, then throws the milk away

    TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM:
    You have 2 cows
    You sell one and buy a bull
    You herd multiplies, and the economy grows
    You sell them and retire on income

    SURREALISM:
    You have 2 giraffes
    The government requires you to take harmonica lessons

    AN AMERICAN CORPORATION:
    You have 2 coes
    You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows
    Later, you hire a consultant to analyse why the cow has dropped dead

    ENRON VENTURE CAPITALISM:
    You have 2 cows
    You sell 3 of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity
    swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows. The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island Corporation secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the right to all seven cows back to your listed company. The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more.
    You sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States, leaving you with nine cows. No balance sheet provided with the release. The public then buys your bull.

    A FRENCH CORPORATION:
    You have 2 cows
    You go on strike, organise a riot, and block the roads, because you want 3 cows.

    A JAPANESE CORPORATION:
    You have 2 cows
    You redesign them so they are one-tenth he size of an ordinary cow and produce 20 times the milk. You then create a clever cow cartoon image called 'Cowkimon' and market it worldwide.

    A GERMAN CORPORATION:
    You have 2 cows
    You re-engineer them so the live for 100 years, eat once a month and milk themselves.

    AN ITALIAN CORPORTATION:
    You have 2 cows, but you don't know where they are
    You decide to have lunch.

    A RUSSIAN CORPORATION:
    You have 2 cows
    You count them and learn you have 5 cows
    You count them again and learn you have 42 cows
    You count them again and learn you have 2 cows
    You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka.

    A SWISS CORPORATION:
    You have 5000 cows. None of them belong to you
    You charge the owners for storing them.

    A CHINESE CORPORATION:
    You have 2 cows
    You have 300 people milking them
    You claim that you have full employment, and high bovine productivity.
    You arrest the newsman who reported the real situation.

    AN INDIAN CORPORATION:
    You have 2 cows
    You worship them.

    A BRITISH CORPORATION:
    You have 2 cows
    Both are mad.

    AN IRAQI CORPORATION:
    Everyone thinks you have lots of cows
    You tell them you have none.
    No-one believes you, so they bomb the hell out of you and invade your country.
    You still have no cows, but at least now you are a part of Democracy....

    AN AUSTRALIAN CORPORATION:
    You have 2 cows
    Business seems pretty good
    You close the office and go for a few beers to celebrate.

    A NEW ZEALAND CORPORATION:
    You have 2 cows
    The one on the left looks very attractive.


    :icon_lol::icon_lol:


    Hope you all enjoyed that, I'm only 13 but I get a few, so you guys should be laughing yourselves silly (I hope!). My dad also had a poster at work which explained basics to survival in vietnam. One hilarious one was 'If your attack is going well, it's an ambush'. My dad's people love having a laugh sometimes. The Australian one is so typical don't you think?

    sigpic


  • #2
    Re: Economic Models explained with Cows -2008 update.

    lol. That's pretty funny. :icon_lol:

    "REMEMBER! Pillage first THEN Burn!"

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    • #3
      Re: Economic Models explained with Cows -2008 update.

      Old joke is old.

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: Economic Models explained with Cows -2008 update.

        It's so old, the cow now gives cheese. Stilton, by the smell of it.
        Dude, seriously, WHAT handkerchief?

        snooggums' density principal: "The more dense a population, the more dense a population."

        Iliana: "You're a great friend but if we're ever chased by zombies I'm tripping you."

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        • #5
          Re: Economic Models explained with Cows -2008 update.

          Country Man:
          Has 10 cows, milks 'em all, mows the lawn goes to bed only to find out all of them were eated by a werewolf. :D
          I dont know why but after reading the American Corporation one, my side was hurting so hard I went to go milk my cow realizing I didn't even own one.

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          • #6
            Re: Economic Models explained with Cows -2008 update.

            This is the thread you got all excited about because no one looked at?


            pfft..


            POE2 Developer

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            • #7
              Re: Economic Models explained with Cows -2008 update.

              LOL, I enjoyed it!

              Comment


              • #8
                Re: Economic Models explained with Cows -2008 update.

                Originally posted by Berlancic View Post
                A NEW ZEALAND CORPORATION:
                You have 2 cows
                The one on the left looks very attractive.
                :icon_lol:

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                • #9
                  Re: Economic Models explained with Cows -2008 update.

                  ok.



                  Interested in listening to guitar playing and a good conversation, look for me on TS.

                  "Hope is for the weak. I hope for nothing. I work for things. That is the only way for events to unfold." -Cleverbot

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Re: Economic Models explained with Cows -2008 update.

                    Originally posted by DrunkenPirate View Post
                    This is the thread you got all excited about because no one looked at?


                    pfft..
                    LOL... I was going to say the same thing :icon_lol:
                    Dizlor


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                    • #11
                      Re: Economic Models explained with Cows -2008 update.

                      ... i had to search through for that? not enough to get that hyped up about
                      powered by Windows 7

                      . . . .

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                      • #12
                        Re: Economic Models explained with Cows -2008 update.

                        Nazism is an economic model? :?

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Re: Economic Models explained with Cows -2008 update.

                          It was meh.

                          These need to be explained...

                          Originally posted by Berlancic
                          NAZISM:
                          You have 2 cows
                          The state takes both and shoots you

                          BUREAUCRATISM
                          You have 2 cows
                          The state takes both, shoots one, milks the other, then throws the milk away

                          TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM:
                          You have 2 cows
                          You sell one and buy a bull
                          You herd multiplies, and the economy grows
                          You sell them and retire on income

                          SURREALISM:
                          You have 2 giraffes
                          The government requires you to take harmonica lessons
                          ...because it does not make any sense to me.

                          Originally posted by Sordavie
                          Nazism is an economic model? :?
                          That was my first thought.
                          |TG-18th| Acreo Aeneas
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                          Former 9th & 13th

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